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In this article, I outline the framework of (auto)ethnographic positioning analysis. Using the example of an unpleasant field experience, I first develop the "metainvective positioning circle," a heuristic model that I use to address the crisis of ethnography, its consequences for methodological development, and its implications for contemporary ethnographic practice. In the further sections, I outline how (auto)ethnographic positioning analysis combines various previously established methodological procedures, how it differs from them, and how it goes beyond them. Furthermore, I highlight key features of (auto)ethnographic positioning analysis and the most promising moments in the research process for its application. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This article brings a posthuman approach to assignments and assessments as they are configured in and by normative practices in educational institutions, including schools and universities. Composed as a collaborative posthuman autoethnography, we use the figuration of the AcademicAssessmentMachine to illuminate how educational assessment-as-usual positions, hierarchizes, grades, and disposes human bodies—both teachers and students—in ways that are affectively damaging and socially unjust. In rethinking educational assignments and assessment as a more-than-human affair, we swerve its purpose and doings toward more affirmative possibilities. We ask how might we disrupt the AcademicAssessmentMachine while being caught within it ourselves? [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

(Auto)ethnographic positioning analysis is a new approach that mobilizes the demarcation between evocative and analytic autoethnography and combines the strengths of both with positioning theory. It is considered a suitable methodology for addressing the ongoing crisis of ethnography, understood as a continuing expression of the moral explosiveness of ethnographic relations in a socially divided and connected world. This introduction outlines the special issue's line of argument and justifies its goal and contribution to the persisting crisis of ethnography. The individual contributions are presented, focusing on how each study "positions" analysis autoethnographically and what this indicates about the respective research fields. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Higher education is in flux with more precarity, a stronger focus on effectiveness, and productivity having resulted in a competitive and hostile culture. For this article, we take a proactive approach to counteract the narrative of silencing by exploring the opportunities collaboration may afford. Drawing on our personal experiences, professional knowledge, and research, we engaged in a collaborative form of poetic inquiry. Our contribution in this article lies with the links we make between collaboration, creativity through autoethnographic poetic inquiry, and translanguaging. This approach constitutes a model for collaboration which counteracts the silencing impact of the contemporary competitive academic culture. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This performative piece is a fictional conversation between Norman Denzin and Ishi, the Yahi Indian, in the Land of the Dead after Norman's passing. Norman wrote a book about Ishi and was working on a second one when he died. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this article, we engage with the concept and theories of "affordance" in the adoption of digital tools to perform qualitative inquiry. We first raise the question of what is afforded when we use online digital tools such as Zoom to interview young children (5–10 years old) and then draw on empirical examples from our multi-sited critical ethnography with transnational Chinese children to illustrate our key methodological points. We lay out three dimensions along which the concept of affordance can be conceptualized: the relational, the embodied situational, and the social-cultural. We discuss the potential to map out a critical approach to enable qualitative researchers to practice reflexivity in technology-mediated qualitative research. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Grading has long been the source of negative emotions in Writing Studies for teachers and students alike; these negative emotions and experiences especially affect women-identifying professors and professors of color. This poetic research study presents the found poems of writing instructors in one predominantly White Midwest US university English department; poems came from restories from participants' interviews about how they developed as assessors of writing. The aim is to foreground lived experiences of college professors who teach undergraduate writing for a living as the field continues to explore ethical and humane ways of assessment for all involved. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this study, I draw upon Endarkened Feminist Epistemology (Dillard, 2012) and Decolonial Feminist Research (Rhee, 2020) to explore the epistemology of my mother, a first-generation Chinese immigrant. Based on data generated from the video-cued qi ethnography methodology, I pay attention to my Mama's ways of knowing as she cooks in the kitchen. Qi is a Chinese concept that means breath, spirit, and life force. I draw on qi as the ongoing connectivity toward wholeness and movement toward harmony in the way I collected and analyzed data. I share my findings as a series of interconnected poetry, images, and narratives to (re)member my mother's life as well as mine as we (re)claim what we have forgotten and (re)turn to a place of wholeness. I conclude the article by exploring the implications for the Asian American Pacific Islander community and beyond, as we conduct the work of collective rememory. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Faculty and staff contribute to a poem about wresting power from prejudice aimed at contributors in personal and professional settings, committing the hatefulness to paper that can be crumpled and thrown away. Meant as post-COVID self-care, the process culminated in disturbingly touching accounts of prejudice and our counter-narratives. Through this collaboration, contributors have refused to let bigotry dictate their lives; instead, utilizing the very language used against them they have reclaimed authority over themselves, in essence turning the table against hatred. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This post-qualitative ethnography reveals elements of childhood and learning that may remain constant across the lifetime continuum. The research occurred for 13 months on a rural peninsula in the Mid-Atlantic region of the United States. Traditional ethnographic data collection methods included field notes, shooting scripts and photo documentation, document collection, interviews, and talks. A post-qualitative analysis produced rich narratives through the lenses of space–time physics, new materialism, and the field of Children's Geographies. Findings indicate new ways to consider childhood and how humans across the lifespan continuously make meaning about both local environments and the greater world. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Blockchain governance occurs through a combination of social and technical activities, involving smart contracts, deliberation within a group, and voting. These processes are significant as they demonstrate how governance of distributed infrastructures is evolving. While typologies of blockchain governance can be constructed by gathering on-chain interactions and formal rules, other aspects are more difficult to observe, including governance interactions occurring inside discussion forums. In this article, we discuss a participatory digital ethnography technique, whereby participants and researchers use a bespoke bot to identify governance interactions occurring within project forums (on Discord). The technique is designed to be used in conjunction with the analysis of software for the purpose of mapping and understanding the "governance surface" of different protocols. We describe our tools and methods for understanding automated futures through a case study of the SourceCred community, an organization using, developing, and maintaining open source software called SourceCred. The SourceCred codebase is also used by other decentralized communities for various organizational functions, including reputation and compensation. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Stimulated by a re-reading of On Human Geography in which Ron Johnston described his shift to an anarchic model of geographical writing, I began to reflect on his approach in comparison to my own semi-anarchic way of being an autoethnographic writer. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this relational ethnography, we write as two white afab genderqueer/trans parents who often find ourselves at best pulled between spaces and parts of ourselves, and at worst pressured to choose between the false dichotomy of our “illegible” place within transness/queerness and “aparent” place within motherhood. Weaving together autoethnographic vignettes of our lived experiences with the writings of QTBIPOC thinkers and pedagogues and their anti-racist white comrades, we reflect on themes of liminality, loneliness, hope, grieving, and love in mothering, kin, and community building and theorize, as queer trans (m)othering mother-ers, about the trans potentialities of being/becoming-with-longing queerly. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Bill Helmreich, ethnographer extraordinaire, passed away due to COVID-19 complications. Walking nearly every inch of New York City and writing about his adventures in fieldnote format, he published several books in what he often referred to as "the city nobody knows" series. Bill hoped to galvanize ethnographers to gather systematic snapshots of other cities around the world and create a lasting sociological account of these places. Upon penning his last book, he made plans to steer his attention to Los Angeles. This essay is a reflection on the lessons I learned from Bill, including his "walk and chat" method. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This article draws on the two authors' extensive fieldwork experiences in studying Chinese feminists and lawyers on social media to offer some thoughts on how to conduct qualitative research in the digitalized world. We argue that qualitative methods such as participation observation, in-depth interview, and textual analysis can provide thick descriptions and deep, localized knowledge of social processes that go far beyond the sketches of Big Data. Social science data collection and analysis on social media need not only Big Data's bird's-eye view, but also the day-to-day ethnographic immersion—"living on the sites" and interacting with research subjects over a long period of time. The rise of social media has not changed the basic principles of doing ethnography, such as the importance of immersion and reflexivity. Nevertheless, ethnography of online groups presents new challenges and opportunities in terms of accessing field sites, analyzing ethnographic data, and research ethics. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Members of a graduate educational ethnography course created pandemic poetry. The instructor was pedagogically stretched in translating what had always been an in-person research poetry creation experience to a virtual setting, but the students responded with powerful poetic renditions. In this article, course members' poetry is featured, and a brief review of the course materials used and guidance provided to the class, along with a methodological reflection, are offered. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In a 2016 special issue on the relationships between ethnography of education and social, economic, and material precarity, Geoff Bright and John Smyth were critical of ethnographic researchers, for concentrating on discourses and discourse production only, rather than on material conditions to develop activism and processes of transformation against oppression. Instead of only identifying and critiquing precarity, and deconstructing taken-for-granted ideas to give voice to ingrained forms of oppression and marginalization, critical ethnography they wrote, should really be about changing, not only describing and analyzing, oppressive conditions. In the present article, we attempt to identify and explore cases where researchers have overcome the reluctance toward activism and transformation. Using empirical examples we will try to illustrate what characterized these efforts and what seemed to support their success. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this article, I present insurgent poetry as a way to decolonize ethnographic knowing. I argue that insurgent poetry tethered to grassroots struggles represents a critical site for decolonizing relationships in activist ethnography. My activist ethnographic work takes place alongside, and in solidarity with Miya communities in Northeast India, who have been disenfranchised and face persecution and statelessness. Presenting poems that effervesced in relation to "fieldwork," I theorize poetry as a decolonial enactment: a form of witnessing that resists a disciplining colonial gaze and creates possibilities for decolonial onto-epistemic rupture/reorientation; in doing so, allowing for radical relationality and reciprocal knowing. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

The article introduces the concept of the "intertwangle," a concept grounded within the gentle collisions of delegates at the 13th International Congress for Qualitative Inquiry at the University of Illinois and the simultaneous retelling of multiple autoethnographies of such encounters. Through such encounters and "retellings," perhaps a different way of thinking about autoethnography is developed. The article presents a story of a journey to and through the 13th Congress. A journey of no answers and no certainty—this journey is not a collaborative sharing of data but more of the gentle collisions and the recounting of different stories located within shared experiences. It is a simple journey bounded by way-markers of uncertainty, at times self-deprecation, loss, and death. It is a journey of new beginnings, of no ends—of uncertainty rather than certainty, revealing rather than obscuring and expanding rather than reducing. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This essay examines the ethnographer's "underground" as a foundational research space lacking in light: the light provided by being fully aware of our motives and by illuminating the "lack" that leads us to look for something in others, who then become the human instruments of our research. From as early as the 1930s, the ethnographic "I" was central to how Michel Leiris viewed his engagement with research, so much so that the French writer and researcher is an often forgotten or underestimated precursor of a type of reflexivity that has placed questioning research subjects at the heart of (auto)ethnography. This essay returns to the forms taken by Leiris's writing, viewing them as a foundational impulse for an autoethnography that takes a detour to the self via others without this simply being a return to the self. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Whereas the arts have acquired a greater role in ethnographic practice as of late, artisanship has not; artisans regularly remain subjects of ethnographic analysis rather than educators or sources of epistemological and aesthetic inspiration for ethnographers. As students of material culture and aesthetic practices, we argue that ethnography has a lot to learn from artisans and advance a vision for an artisan-inspired ethnography. In particular, we ask, "what would an artisanal ethnography be like?" "What can we learn from artisans as ethnographic educators?" "How would the artisanship-inspired ethnographer work?" "What would be his or her styles, tools, goals, and guiding principles?" Through a methodological reflection on the production of our film A Time for Making, we engage with these questions. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This article is an investigation of the agency of matter and an exposition of the new materialist methods I have been developing as part of a muti-sited trans-national ethnography that features socially engaged arts practices alongside more traditional ethnographic and qualitative techniques. I think through the agency of matter and consider the temporality of matter as part of its agency, understanding these agents as constitutive features of the research assemblage. Drawing on ethnographic fieldwork from the United Kingdom, I examine how matter's space-time can impact processes of making the social. I develop theoretical resources for moving the field forward. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

What means qualitative inquiry in the public sphere? What are public spheres for qualitative inquiry? First, to transgress the disciplinary boundaries of qualitative inquiry. Second, to identify research problems of societal relevance and target groups affected. Third, to make our results accessible for public audiences—how we write about our research and where we publish our findings. Fourth, to face changing political discourses with our research. Public sociology and ethnography are discussed for their relevance for qualitative inquiry in the public sphere. An overview of the contributions and the way this idea is treated in them are given. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

The current article presents the experiences of a pacifist-soldier who was drafted into the Israel Defense Forces in the 1980s. Using a poetic (auto) ethnographic mode of research, this article explores the ways in an individual with self-professed pacifist orientations responds and contends with realities of being drafted into an army and a situation which he ethically disagrees with. The poem follows the events and emotional responses to different aspects of being in the army and the strategic way in which agency was enacted under very restrictive social circumstances termed by the participant as "subversive, unannounced non-compliance." The current poetic (auto) ethnography aims to contribute to the literature of soldier experiences and explicate one individual's response to being drafted against his will into an army he did not identify or agree with. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this article, we argue that loss often precedes critique in postcritical ethnographic work. We position this argument in relation to the moral and the political commitments that imbue postcritical ethnography, noting how a postcritical perspective invites researchers to theorize and imagine what could be otherwise. We ground our discussion in a 4-year ethnography we carried out with Burundians with refugee status living in southern Appalachia in the United States. As we retrace some of the steps, silences, and tensions we embodied in this postcritical ethnographic work, we work to examine the place of loss, grief, and critique in the pursuit of what could have been otherwise and was not. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

"Notes on Terrible Educations" is a collective auto/ethnographic account of educational experiences. Through the usage of poetry and narrative, storytelling, and fictionalized accounts, this essay interrogates the authors' educational experiences to bare witness, confront, reimagine, and provide redress, as necessary, to those negative experiences, persons, and teachers who shaped their schooling/educational journey. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this article, we focus on the communicative character of visuality and visual representations ("visuals") in transdisciplinary science communication (science slams) and interdisciplinary communication within science (group talks). We propose a methodology for the study of visuality and the use of visuals as communicative actions. Both unfold within a triadic structure of social actors and the objectivations they (re-)produce. Therefore, we combine the approach of videography and focused ethnography. This research design allows not only putting actions under an audiovisual microscope but also to combine ethnographic knowledge stemming from fieldwork with the audiovisual analysis in front of screens. Using data from our empirical fields (science communication in science slams as well as communication within science in group talks), we illustrate the vital role of visuality of new practices in the communicative construction of (scientific) reality. In doing so, we also emphasize the importance of audiovisual methods for qualitative empirical social research today. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

New digital devices monitoring the body are increasingly used as research devices. As highly intimate new media objects, placed next to our skin, they challenge our notions of privacy and contribute to the generation of affects—disrupting considerations of "successful" research. In this article, we offer an auto-ethnographic study of (not) using a wearable sleep-tracking device, the ŌURA smart ring, as a research device. We discuss the unexpected, intense affects we experienced when attempting to use the ring during a "failed" research process, feeling enchanted and harassed by it in turn. Reflecting on our affects enables us to identify different forms of intimacy: those related to disrupting the bodily norms of academia, and those disrupting the privacy of the sleeping body. To conclude, we discuss the potential of these disruptions to offer a better understanding of the significant role of the thing-power of research devices in qualitative research process. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

The ways in which we approach children and childhood as variables of social analysis has undergone profound change in the last quarter century in the Republic of Ireland. This performative ethnography inquires into the secret lore and language of deaf children's lives in one residential school. Out of sight of the community of the other, children willfully embodied a transgressive, liberatory, and decolonizing sign language of their own. Medium and message come together in this performative ethnography through a clutch of theatrical devices associated with the "epic theater" of the German playwright and theater director, Bertolt Brecht, including loosely connected scenes, storyline turns, political placards, and addresses to audience. Techniques associated with "found poetry," or the literary equivalent of collage, are combined with pentimenti or a painting within a painting to fuse image and word and bring forward a critical and political aesthetics of deaf children and deaf schooling and new media for encouraging alternative social imaginaries and possible actions. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

I write autoethnographically to explore Joni Mitchell's return to the stage after a prolonged absence. In doing so, I aim to consider what it means to be present at a distance in the digital moment. I hope this work encourages others on their respective paths. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Research-informed theater is often informed by an assumed linear trajectory between research findings and performance, overlooking the multiple embodied perspectives that are implicated in the development of research-informed theater. To challenge this assumption, we explore how artist-researchers draw on their own embodiment and imagination as ways to understand the research findings, how they conceptualize the intended audience, and how those understandings shape the creative process of the research-informed play. Using the case study of the research-informed play Cracked: New Light on Dementia, we focus on three interrelated modes of practice: playful extending, foolish disrupting, and inventive disrupting. We argue that these modes of practice create an aesthetic of relationality, what we define as an aesthetic space within which the embodied interpretive work of artist-researchers is extended into spatial, relational contexts. We discuss implications of this theoretical framework for a new critical inquiry. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This family farm in Wisconsin was started in 1868 by my great-grandparents and farmed by the generations that followed. My brother and I inherited the farm and tried to keep its 160 acres as a working farm, even as we lived in other places and pursued other careers. What is a family farm, we finally asked, if there is no family on the land to farm it? My way of letting go of this childhood home and family farm is to tell the tale as a witness to the ending of another family farm. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Despite the growing body of literature that critically assesses the ambiguous impacts of institutional review boards (IRBs) on anthropological research, the key standards on which the IRB evaluations are based often remain unquestioned. By exposing the genealogy of an undercover research in which the authors participated as ethnographer, supervisor, and research participant, this article problematizes some of these standards and addresses the issues of power dynamics in research, informed consent, and anonymization in published work. It argues that rather than addressing genuine ethical dilemmas, IRB standards and the ethical fiction of informed consent mainly protect researchers from having to openly face the uncertainties of fieldwork. As an alternative, the authors put forth the notion of c/overt research, which perceives any research as processual and, in effect, becoming overt only during the research process itself. As such, it forces researchers to cultivate sensitivity to research ethics. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

A recent special issue of Qualitative Inquiry (December 2016) throws a welcome spotlight on the place of songs within qualitative research. In this essay, I share a story that contributes to the gathering conversation around music and songs as a (perhaps unique) form of qualitative inquiry. My contribution focuses specifically on songwriting as a form of research, which has received limited attention to date within the qualitative inquiry literature. The story is inspired by recent explorations of songwriting as reflexive practice, and I share it with the aim of expanding understanding and inviting further dialogue on the processes of writing (songs as) qualitative research. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Using autocritography, this essay acts as a critical performance of interracial communication, civil and academic unrest, and theatre during the Grand Jury Hearing for Darren Wilson a year after he murdered Michael Brown in the streets of Ferguson. On the second day of my interview for the intercultural communication professor position at Saint Louis University, the grand jury decided not to indict Darren Wilson. Protests erupted around the city. Later that week, after Thanksgiving and as protests began to wane, my family and I went to the Fabulous Fox Theatre to view Motown: The Musical. Drawing from canonical prejudice, this essay adds canonical exception to the discussion in an attempt to illuminate the repulsive practice of respectability politics in policed spaces like the academy, theatre, and music. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This article reflects on a performative praxis entailing cultural, symbolic, embodied, and political processes involved in negotiating difference and sameness from the perspective of doing disability research in India as a disabled “halfie.” Based on my own disability experience that disrupted binaries between insider and outsider, I argue that researchers’ disability identities themselves may not be sufficient for becoming an insider to the disability community, due to varying intersectional and cultural contexts. Exposing inadequacies of the liberal disability studies methodology in the social sciences, I draw from critical qualitative methods rooted in performative, postcolonial, and critical ethnography to address questions of positionality and reflexivity, facilitating similitude and knowledge production. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This essay pursues three interrelated and reflexively challenging objectives. First, we celebrate Mikhail Bakhtin’s “Discourse in the Novel” as constituting a singular primer for writing and accomplishing dialogical ethnography. Second, we exemplify and dramatize its lessons by relating stories and practices of the first author’s 4-year ongoing field study and involvement with languages preservation, community enhancement, and social transformation in Kham Tibet. Finally, we accomplish these first two purposes in a self-consciously reflexive manner seeking to embody Bakhtin’s suggestions even as we describe them. We close with a tentative description of languages and voices we notice in writing this essay. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In a recent article published in this journal, Atkinson and Morris explore the kinds of expertise and competence needed by ethnographic researchers. In doing so, they refer to the work of Collins and Evans and, in particular, the idea of interactional expertise, which they dismiss as largely unhelpful to their project. In this response, we show that the Atkinson and Morriss miss-represent this work in important ways and that, if these mistakes are corrected, interactional expertise provides a useful way of addressing the methodological concerns they identify. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This article introduces the reader to the work of Australian verbatim playwright Alana Valentine and examines the ways she raises the issue of veracity or truthfulness in her 2016 verbatim play Ladies Day. The article begins with a brief description of verbatim theater and the importance of veracity in verbatim theater and research-informed theater. It then moves to an analysis of the way Valentine takes up issues of veracity in Ladies Day. The article concludes with a discussion of the implications Valentine’s work has for research-informed theater practitioners in the social sciences. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Autoethnography, ethnographies, methodologies, arts-based inquiry, methods of inquiry, investigative poetry. [Extracted from the article]

This article presents a praxeologically informed approach to “transgressing the researcher-subject” in ethnography. I unfurl a concept of “strong” reflexivity as developing a perspective of unfamiliarity toward one’s own practices and beliefs. By drawing on my study on practicing ballet, I illustrate how I dealt with my own bodily involvement as a professional dance student. Comparing my approach with evocative autoethnography, I not only emphasize that corporeal sensitivity and alertness are inherent to both styles of inquiry. Yet, I also point out their differences. Whereas evocative autoethnography takes subjectivity as a resource for insights, this approach uses it as an instrument for discovery. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This contribution explores autoethnography as a strongly reflexive approach to qualitative research and its reception in German-speaking sociology and cultural anthropology. Over recent years, our academic communities have developed an increased interest in autoethnography, although many reactions range from critical to hostile: It is accused of solipsism, narcissism, lack of arguments and theory, affective immediacy, non-criticizability, endorsement of neoliberal politics, a threat to disciplinary identity, and a strategic mistake in the fight for appreciation of qualitative research. We discuss each point of criticism and translate our insights into more general considerations on strong reflexivity in German-speaking cultural and social sciences. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This performance ethnography presents a multi-vocal dialog of a group of social workers and social work students dealing with personal and professional issues of critical social work. Performance ethnography is an innovative qualitative research method that uses a dramatic medium to bridge between theory and personal experiences and between research, teaching, and learning. Through personal writing and a discussion of an intervention story, we present our experience with critical social work. The play-like structure presents the group dialog as an important medium for encouraging critical reflexivity and for reviving theoretical critical social work concepts with personal and practical meanings. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Two central struggles facing activist scholars, including critical ethnographers of education, are (a) power relations researchers and participants navigate and (b) dissemination of our work to reach multiple audiences, including study participants and others outside academia. This one-act ethnodrama was written as part of a critical ethnography of a community change initiative. Ethnodrama is an appropriate choice given roles afforded participants and audience in which emotional connections and closeness of data and experience are highlighted. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

This autoethnographic account details the struggles to accept my own identity and same-sex attraction. Due to my need to pass, I moved often. With each move, I found the darkness that I needed to survive for it was only in the darkness that I could explore my desire and simultaneously stay hidden. Coming out of the darkness began an intensely difficult journey. This journey takes the discussion of growing up in a shame culture further into adult life and the effect over time that growing up in such a culture has on life, self-worth, and love. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

In this performance autoethnography, we the authors are inspired by the triple autoethnographic work of Bryant K. Alexander, Hari S. Kumar, and Claudio Moreira. From different moments in their professional careers, they come together to write their biographies into history, creating stories that at the same time resist and demand to be told. Our goal is to write our life into legitimation of a theoretical framework—performance autoethnography—that is not yet accepted in Brazilian academy. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

The end of the story is all you care about. So, let’s get that out of the way first. Penelope Jane was born on March 23rd. She was healthy. The trauma of that day still resonates within my body, called into being through subsequent visits to the hospital and a review of my own medical records from that day. A life-threatening fever and 9 hours of pushing led to a powerfully negative birth experience, one that I am consistently told to just forget. After she had a weeklong stay in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), I have a healthy daughter. In this article, I use auto/archeology as a tool to examine my own medical records and the affective traces of my experience in the hospital to call into question Halberstam’s advocacy of forgetting as queer resistance to dominant cultural logics. While Halberstam explains that “forgetting allows for a release from the weight of the past and the menace of the future” I hold tightly to my memories of that day. This article marks the disconnects between an advocacy of forgetting and my own failure of childbirth and offers a new perspective that embraces the queer potentiality of remembering trauma. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]

Through a three words poem, I share my constructed color voice developed from looking for and sensing my ‘I’ through the lens of worldwide international students in my learning experiences in different international “white” universities. At the same time, my ‘I’ is embodied from my fieldwork with Colombian women refugees or seeking for refuge, and as a Latin American woman living in northern Chile. In this way, interpretive [auto] ethnography is a path to situate my ‘I’ in a context where silences, forgetfulness, and “whiteness” behind our voices are consequences of social, political, and historical forces that have erased our indigenous and multicultural heritage in Chile. Today, the tendency in education is teaching, learning, and acting as if we are White people. This piece is an invitation to think-reflect-look-feel-remember and ask ourselves about what the color of our voice is and what the consequences of this standpoint in the academia are. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]