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NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLERUSA TODAY #1 NONFICTION BESTSELLERPUBLISHERS WEEKLY BESTSELLERA manual for every woman who wants to stop endless negative self-talk, create unshakable confidence, and jump-start a life of joy and power. It all begins with your thoughts.I never look good in tight skirts. I can't ask for a raise or my boss will think I'm greedy. I'm getting too old to find a partner. I'm a bad mom. I'm always behind. I'll never be good enough. What if every time you had a self-critical thought, you heard it in a man's voice? The truth is not far off. Living in a patriarchy, women absorb a lifetime of messages that say your worth is defined by your looks, your accomplishments, and how well you take care of everyone around you. In fact, these messages are so pervasive that, even knowing they exist, they still manage to program themselves into our brains. The result is that women end up feeling anxious, guilty, and vaguely ashamed of themselves no matter how much they do for others or achieve for themselves.So how do we deprogram our thoughts from patriarchy's corrosive influence? And once we do, how can we create new, self-empowering beliefs?Master Certified Life Coach and host of the UnF•ck Your Brain podcast Kara Loewentheil knows how. Despite graduating from Harvard Law School and getting her dream job, Kara spent her twenties and thirties feeling insecure and anxious, until she learned how to change her thoughts—which led her to become a coach. In Take Back Your Brain, she draws on cognitive psychology, feminist theory, and years of experience as a neuroplasticity-focused coach to break down how the patriarchy hijacks women's brains, and how women can get free. To bridge the gap between your inner voice and your true potential, she says, you must begin with your thoughts. By using the skills in this book to literally rewire your brain, you can create new thought patterns that will directly transform outcomes in your life.Ultimately, Take Back Your Brain invites you to replace the thoughts that no longer serve you and make room for a kind of confidence you never thought possible. Because when women unleash their true power, they awaken new possibilities for the world.

Tell your inner critic to take a back seat, so you can start feeling more calm, confident, and kickass! Negative self-talk can feel like an ever-present roommate who insists on giving you unsolicited opinions about every aspect of yourself— including your worth, appearance, personality, and life choices. Have you ever wondered where this annoying inner critic comes from? And more importantly, can you make it go away? Unfortunately, no matter what you do, negative thoughts will happen. It's simply how our brains are wired. But you can change the way you respond to these thoughts. This take-anywhere, use-anytime guide offers quick, simple, and evidence-based skills drawn from acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) to help you make peace with your inner frenemy. You'll discover what drives these negative thoughts, why it's important to listen to them—yes, you read that right, listen—and how to put them in perspective so you can go back to the things that really matter in your life. You never know when negative thoughts will show up, crash your party, cramp your style, and get in the way of living your best life. But once you learn how to respond to this negative inner chatter, you'll be able to turn the volume down and listen to your true inner voice—your inner ally—more clearly, and use it as a compass throughout your day.

Este audiolibro ¡ FUNCIONA!, contiene el secreto para transformar tu vida. Lo comprueban millones de personas alrededor del mundo que, a través de este conocimiento, han aceptado este reto: Coloca en tu muñeca una pulsera, y cada vez que te des cuenta que te estás quejando, criticando o divulgando chismes, cambiártela de una mano a otra. Mantenla en una misma mano 21 días: Hazte consciente de lo que dices, cambia tus palabras, tu forma de pensar y desarrolla tu vida con un propósito. Esta práctica es capaz de aliviar historias terriblemente dolorosas, sana relaciones, y opera el milagro de hacerte verdaderamente FELIZ.-

Self-talk matters, but what methods of building healthy self-talk actually work? This how-to guide shares evidence-based techniques to go from being your own worst critic to your own best friend. Perhaps you want to be nicer to yourself but don't really know how to get there. Or maybe you're someone who assumes self-criticism is a permanent part of your personality. Rest assured you're not alone—millions of people struggle with the toll that excessive self-criticism takes on their minds, energy levels, jobs, and relationships. And problems with self-talk vary dramatically from one person to the next: they can appear as mild but persistent inner criticism, full-blown self-loathing, or the pain of internalized oppression or abuse. After over twenty years of working with individuals, groups, and classes on self-criticism and related challenges, psychologist and mindfulness teacher Dr. Rachel Goldsmith Turow offers the “self-talk workout”—six doable exercises that can help you replace self-criticism with self-kindness and self-encouragement. Specific self-talk strategies such as “Spot the success,” “Fail forward,” and “Allowing all feelings, skillfully,” require just a few minutes a day. These skills can be practiced individually to transform your self-talk, or you can choose to combine two or more exercises to enhance your self-talk workout. Each chapter features a core exercise, variations on the strategy that might feel right for you, scientific studies supporting each approach, and success stories to inspire your own practice. Turow includes examples from her own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from her students and respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh, to show that the burden of harsh self-criticism need not go on forever: the way that we relate to ourselves can be changed.

Self-blame is an integral part of our lives. We often blame ourselves for our failings and experience familiar unpleasant emotions such as guilt, shame, regret, or remorse. Self-blame is also what we often aim for when we blame others: we want the people we blame to recognize their wrongdoing and blame themselves for it. Moreover, self-blame is typically considered a necessary condition for forgiveness. However, until now, self-blame has not been an integral part of the theoretical debate on moral responsibility. This volume presents twelve new essays by leading moral philosophers, who set out bold new theories of the nature and ethics of self-blame, and the interconnection between self-blame and moral responsibility. The essays cast new light on traditional problems in the debate on moral responsibility and open new, exciting avenues for research in moral philosophy, moral psychology and the philosophy of punishment.

Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book. Book Preview: #1 Perfectionism can be defined as the belief that if you don't do everything perfectly, you shouldn't do anything at all. This type of perfectionism reduces the number of situations in which a person will take action. #2 Perfectionism by quantity means not being satisfied with an action if it falls below a number threshold. People seem to think of perfectionism mostly in the sense of quality: getting your hair perfect, having a perfect social interaction, and keeping your desk spotless. However, the most dangerous form of perfectionism is the perfectly sized achievements. #3 If you're insecure about something, know that there is someone out there who is living confidently and living well in spite of it. That's comforting and empowering. #4 Inferiority complexes are a form of self-loathing. If you believe that you're inferior to other people, it only makes sense to try to be superior in appearance or behavior. If you have a passive, shy personality, this usually results in the turtle response.

“Read this book and experience the freedom to create your reality.” —Deepak Chopra, MD, author of Total Meditation Don't believe everything your mind tells you. Are you a chronic overthinker? Do you obsess to the point of feeling anxious, hopeless, angry, or stressed out? Have you ever tried to “think your way out” of one of these negative thought spirals, only to fall in deeper? Let's face it: trying to escape your thoughts—or control them—just doesn't work, and can actually make you more miserable in the long run. So, how can you overcome your addiction to thinking? In Can't Stop Thinking, psychotherapist and spiritual counselor Nancy Colier offers the keys to breaking free from the obsessive rumination that drives stress, worry, and anxiety. Using powerful tools grounded in the ancient wisdom of mindfulness and evidence-based acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), you'll learn how to observe and gain distance from troubling thoughts, put an end to harsh self-criticism, and manage difficult feelings like resentment and shame. If you're ready to discover a life beyond your thoughts—one of self-compassion, presence, and peace—it's time to stop thinking and start living.

Loslassen, was einen beschwert und somit leichter leben - wer möchte das nicht! Wie wir kreativer mit dem, was uns beschwert, umgehen und zu einer neuen Leichtigkeit finden, dazu gibt Sylvia Wetzel in ihrem Buch vielfältige Anregungen, verbunden mit praktischen Ühungen aus dem reichen Schatz des Buddhismus. Ihre Schlüsselworte sind Achtsamkeit, Selbsterkenntnis, Vertrauen sowie Lust, Neues auszuprobieren. Nehmen wir uns in unserem Denken, Fühlen und Tun realistischer wahr, merken wir auch, wodurch wir es uns selbst oft schwerer machen als nötig. Wir können dann geschickter mit alten Strukturen umgehen und sie auf sanfte Weise verändern, so dass unser Herz sich öffnet und unser Geist sich klärt. Dies sind wichtige Voraussetzungen dafür, in unserem Leben mehr Glück und Leichtigkeit, Verbundenheit und Freude zu erfahren. Das Buch enthält eine Fülle inspirierender Gedanken und Meditationsübungen, insbesondere für die Erkundung der eigenen Gefühlswelt. Die Autorin zeigt, wie wir uns vertraut machen mit dem, was uns heilt und unterstützt; wie wir unnötigen Ballast abwerfen und neue Wege für uns entdecken; wie wir Gewohnheitsmuster sanft verändern und tiefe Wertschätzung für uns und andere entwickeln; wie wir die vielen positiven Möglichkeiten des Lebens besser wahrnehmen und nutzen. Denn für die eigene Gemütslage ist entscheidend, wie wir mit angenehmen und unangenehmen Gefühlen umgehen, ob wir uns das Leben schwer oder leicht machen.

Ready to take your business to the next level? Find out everything you need to know about delivering and receiving constructive feedback with this practical guide.Most of us find it difficult to deliver feedback: no matter how constructive we intend our comments to be, there is always a risk that the other person will feel attacked and react with defensiveness or even outright hostility. Similarly, when it is our turn to listen to feedback, many of us struggle to accept other people's comments and make meaningful changes. However, by making you aware of your strengths, weaknesses and areas for improvement, constructive feedback can increase your self-awareness and self-confidence and give you and your team the added edge you need to succeed.In 50 minutes you will be able to:•Identify the different kinds of feedback and learn when they should be used•Give yourself the best possible chance of success by adapting your approach to the person•Be more receptive to feedback and use it to improve your performanceABOUT 50MINUTES.COM | COACHING The Coaching series from the 50Minutes collection is aimed at all those who, at any stage in their careers, are looking to acquire personal or professional skills, adapt to new situations or simply re-evaluate their work-life balance. The concise and effective style of our guides enables you to gain an in-depth understanding of a broad range of concepts, combining theory, constructive examples and practical exercises to enhance your learning.

Too much stress puts us at risk of relapse and can harm our health, but how can we avoid stress during a global health crisis? Start by calming the critical voice inside.Combining thought-awareness, loving-kindness practice and mindfulness meditation, this simple, time-tested method can be used throughout the day to quiet your critical voices and ease the mind. Through short, accessible phrases, readers will learn to reorient thinking when their inner critic shows up. You've probably heard it said, and have maybe spoken the words yourself, “I am my own worst critic.” A negative internal running commentary contributes to a lack of confidence and low self-worth in many people. Well-known mindfulness meditation teacher and author, Therese Jacobs-Stewart, offers one of the most effective approaches to calming a self-critical mind: the ancient Buddhist practice of using “Compassion Slogans.” Combining thought-awareness, loving-kindness practice and mindfulness meditation, this simple, time-tested method can be used throughout the day to quiet your critical voices and ease the mind. Through short, accessible phrases, you will learn to reorient your thinking when your inner critic shows up. Instead of making a negative thought stronger by fighting it, you will learn to let thoughts dissipate through lack of attention. When you remember to “begin kindness with yourself,” you will find that keeping a compassionate perspective on all that you do and say will allow you to transform your inner critic with a kinder voice. Some examples of mindfulness slogans: Everything is of the nature to change (even me) Abandon poisonous food (thoughts) Rest in the openness of mind Begin kindness with ourselves

One of Book Authority's Best Self-Esteem eBooks of All TimeReady to live your dream life?You know that sneaky voice inside your head telling you that you're not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, whatever enough? That's your Mean Girl. And she's doing her best to keep you stuck in Fear Town, too scared to go after the life you always imagined. But enough's enough! Melissa Ambrosini has made a life beyond her wildest dreams, all by mastering her Mean Girl, busting through limiting beliefs and karate-chopping through the fears that held her hostage for years. And now she wants to help you remember not only what you are capable of, but how amazing you truly are! In this inspiring, upbeat guide, Melissa provides a practical plan for creating your own version of a kick-ass life — one that's wildly wealthy, fabulously healthy and bursting with love. Designed to propel you out of stuck-ness and into action, this is a must read if you're ready to let go of your Mean Girl and start living the life of your dreams.

Do you ever find yourself thinking, how could you be so stupid, you look fat, or you're a horrible mother? Are you afraid people will find out you've fooled them into thinking you're competent? If you're guilty of expressing these types of discouraging messages, then you have a bitch in your head. This self-critical behavior can wreak havoc with your life—it can keep you from getting the love you want, the raise you deserve, or even a good night's sleep.Dr. Plumez began to notice a pattern with her patients being too hard on themselves. She found that gentler approaches didn't work, but when she told them they were being a bitch—to themselves!—they finally recognized their self-defeating attitude and how much it was weighing them down.With this book, Dr. Plumez can help you banish the bitch. It identifies the different types of “bitches”—work, marriage, parenting, and so on—and provides effective tools and techniques to combat the forms of self-destruction described. Once you begin to encourage rather than criticize, you will find that your career, social life, and relationships almost magically improve.

Now you can stop your self-defeating thoughts and start loving yourself and feeling more confident using bestselling authors Christine Arylo and Amy Ahlers's seven-step method to shutting down your inner mean girl.Most of us quickly recognize when others bully or disrespect us, but it's harder to discern when we do it to ourselves. We all have the voice that whispers in our ears that we are not good enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, or deserving of all we desire. Well, that voice now has a name—ladies, meet your Inner Mean Girl, the judgmental, critical, and belittling inner bully that almost every woman hears running through her mind on a daily basis, creating a constant mindset of anxiety, insecurity, and stress. But there is way to hush this toxic voice. Reform Your Inner Mean Girl introduces a universal seven-step program that helps women transform their relationships with themselves from self-sabotage to self-love and self-confidence. With a mix of play, humor, creativity, and self-inquiry, Reform Your Inner Mean Girl transforms a woman's self-bullying thoughts, emotions, actions, and feelings, and helps her get in touch with her most powerful voice—her Inner Wisdom. By quieting our inner critics, we become aware of the hold that societal pressures have on us and recognize all the wonderful traits we do possess, leaving us feeling strong, empowered, and ready to take on the world!

Are there areas in your life that you just can't seem to get traction, get over, get happy, or get unstuck? That no amount of therapy, positive thinking, bodywork, books, or pharmaceutical'cures'can fix? How To Permanently Erase Negative Self-Talk: So You Can Be Extraordinary teaches you how to access the real cause of your struggles—the negative messages imprinted on the subconscious since childhood—and heal the wounded parts of you that are holding onto the pain, misunderstandings, and gut-wrenching memories that prevent you from feeling good. It demonstrates the little-known, cutting-edge technique to get rid of these messages, overcome fears and self-doubt, and get unstuck and unleashed. If you're tired of burying the pain with addictions or fed up with depression, anxiety, and disease, then it's time to stop attacking yourself emotionally and get access to the wealth, health, relationships, and happiness you truly deserve.

Anja Gerber-Oehlmann Zündstoff Kritik So bleiben Sie gelassen und souverän! Jeder von uns hat mehr oder weniger täglich mit Kritik zu tun. Sei es, dass er selbst andere Menschen kritisiert (aktiv), sei es, dass er von anderen kritisiert wird (passiv). Für die meisten von uns ist Kritik eher unangenehm, beinhaltet sie doch oft Punkte, in denen wir uns als Person infrage gestellt sehen. Dieser Ratgeber wird Ihnen das Leben an Ihrem Arbeitsplatz und in Ihrer Partnerschaft erleichtern: Lernen Sie in wenigen Schritten, wie Sie Ihren persönlichen Kritik-Zündstoff entschärfen und somit gelassener und souveräner reagieren können. Lernen Sie auch, wie Sie Ihrerseits andere auf verträgliche Art und Weise auf Fehler hinweisen können.

Nobody likes criticism. Handled poorly, it too often stings and breeds resentment—and most of us try to avoid it at all costs. But criticism—crafted carefully and communicated skillfully—promotes trust and respect, motivates individuals, and serves as a catalyst for change. It has the ability to turbocharge workplaces and careers. If that sounds far-fetched, it's because few understand how to properly give and receive the kind of critical feedback that brings positive results. The Truth Doesn't Have to Hurt rejuvenates this powerful but neglected art form. Executives, managers, team leaders—anyone who needs to temper praise with a dose of reality—will learn to: Deliver the truth and have it taken as helpful • Create an atmosphere of acceptance • Avoid mistakes that sabotage an exchange • Control how they receive criticism so they benefit—even if it's badly presented Ignoring problems or always saying nice things will only maintain the status quo. This research-backed book delivers proven techniques and tools for motivating people and triggering improvement—swiftly and painlessly.

Un guide pratique et accessible pour apprendre à donner et à recevoir un feed-back en toute tranquillité!Dans un monde professionnel où l'exigence est de plus en plus forte, il est fondamental d'obtenir un retour sur son travail afin de s'améliorer et de dépasser ses faiblesses. Suivant cette logique, pourquoi ne pas se familiariser à la pratique du feed-back? Que ce soit pour le donner ou le recevoir, mieux vaut s'y préparer pour ne pas laisser les émotions prendre le dessus.Ce livre vous aidera à : • préparer et transmettre un feed-back constructif à un collaborateur • recevoir et accepter les critiques pour en retirer le meilleur • prendre du recul par rapport aux tensions parfois vécues en entreprise • et bien plus encore!Le mot de l'éditeur :« Avec l'auteure, Véronique Bronckart, nous avons cherché à fournir aux lecteurs des astuces pour les aider à transmettre et recevoir un feed-back constructif. »Juliette NèveÀ PROPOS DE LA SÉRIE 50MINUTES | Coaching proLa série « Coaching pro » de la collection « 50MINUTES » s'adresse à tous ceux qui, en période de transition ou non, désirent acquérir de nouvelles compétences, réagir face à une situation qui les incommode, ou tout simplement réévaluer leur équilibre de travail. Dans un style simple et dynamique, nos auteurs combinent de la théorie, des pistes de réflexion, des exemples concrets et des exercices pratiques pour permettre à chacun d'avancer sur le chemin de l'épanouissement professionnel.

Self-criticism is a personality trait that has been implicated in a wide range of psychopathologies and developmental arrests. Defined as the tendency to set unrealistically high standards for one's self and to adopt a punitive stance towards the self once these standards are not met, self-criticism is both active and cyclical. Self-critics actively create the social-interpersonal conditions that generate their distress, and their distress itself exacerbates self-criticism. Erosion offers a comprehensive treatment of self-criticism based in philosophy, developmental science, personality and clinical psychology, social theories, and cognitive-affective neuroscience. Professor Golan Shahar expertly summarizes the most recent research on the topic and synthesizes theory, empirical research, and clinical practice guidelines for assessment, prevention, and treatment. The book rests upon three elements that, as Shahar argues, are central to the maintenance of self-critical vulnerability: the importance of a concept of an authentic self or the need to'feel real'; the importance of intentionality and goal-directedness; and the power of interpersonal relationships and cultural context. Shahar argues that exploring these elements requires an integrated clinical approach that incorporates multidimensional assessment and interventions which reconcile science, practice, and policy. The result is a broad and scholarly volume that is useful to practitioners, researchers, and theorists interested in self-criticism.

One mark of interpersonal relationships is a tendency to blame. But what precise evaluations and responses constitute blame? Is it most centrally a judgment, or is it an emotion, or something else? Does blame express a demand, or embody a protest, or does it simply mark an impaired relationship? What accounts for its force or sting, and how similar is it to punishment? The essays in this volume explore answers to these (and other) questions about the nature of blame, but they also explore the various norms that govern the propriety of blame. The traditional question is whether anyone ever deserves to be blamed, but the essays here provide a fresh perspective by focusing on blame from the blamer's perspective instead. Is our tendency to blame a vice, something we should work to replace with more humane ways of relating, or does it rather lie at the very heart of a commitment to morality? What can we legitimately expect of each other, and in general, what sort of attitude do would-be blamers need to have in order to have the standing to blame? Hypocritical or self-righteous blame seems objectionable, but why? The contributions to this volume aim to give us a fuller picture of the nature and norms of blame, and more generally of the promises and perils of membership in the human moral community.

Learn to Love YourselfFrom Stress to Happiness. Many of us know intellectually that we need to be good to ourselves if we want to be happy. But it feels so hard. We are simultaneously the harsh judge and the lost, scared child who wants to stop feeling judged. It becomes a vicious cycle. It only stops when we step outside ourselves and observe how we got ourselves stuck. Only then can we learn to practice gratitude and positive thinking.Joy and Peace. Lori Deschene, creator of TinyBuddha.com and the self-help journals Tiny Buddha's Worry Journal and Tiny Buddha's Gratitude Journal, shares 40 unique perspectives and insights to help you stop judging yourself so harshly. Featuring stories selected from hundreds of TinyBuddha.com contributors, Tiny Buddha's Guide to Loving Yourself provides an honest look at what it means to overcome critical, self-judging thoughts to create a peaceful, empowered life.More than a Self-Help Book. Tiny Buddha's Guide to Loving Yourself is a collection of vulnerable reflections and epiphanies from people who are learning to love themselves, just like you. In this book, you will find:Four authentic, vulnerable stories in each chapterInsightful observations about our shared struggles and how to overcome themAction-oriented suggestions based on the wisdom in the storiesReaders of inspirational books and spiritual books like The Book of Joy or other books by Lori Deschene such as Tiny Buddha's Worry Journal or Tiny Buddha's Gratitude Journal will love Tiny Buddha's Guide to Loving Yourself.

Raymond M. Bergner offers the first comprehensive reference to address the highly prevalent and debilitating forms of self-criticism. This resource features an extensive array of strategies for assessing these patterns as well as the factors maintaining them. In addition, the volume is complete with therapeutic intervention strategies to help patients abandon pathological self-critical practices. The author desribes a therapeutic relationship that greatly enchances the efficacy of the interventions mentioned throughout the book.

Full of practical ideas and inspiring stories from people who have already transformed their lives through the Complaint Free program, you'll learn not only how to stop complaining but also how to become more positive and live the life you've always dreamed about. More than ten million people in 106 countries have used the simple principles found in this book to eradicate the toxicity of complaining from their lives. And, as a result, they have experienced better health, happier relationships, greater career success and a significant increase in happiness.A Complaint Free World will explain what constitutes a complaint, why we complain, what benefits we think we receive from complaining, how complaining is destructive to our lives, and how we can get others around us to stop complaining. Find out how forming the simple habit of not complaining can transform your health, relationships, career and life. Consciously striving to reformat your mental hard drive is not easy, but you can start now by using the steps Bowen presents here. If you stay with it, you'll find that not only will you stop complaining, but others around you will cease to do so as well and in a short period of time, you'll have a more positive life. “A Complaint Free World is an engaging, enjoyable, easy-to-read reminder that the only permanent, constructive changes you can make in the world are the changes that you make in yourself.” –Gary Zukav, author of The Seat of the Soul and Soul to Soul

Everyone knows someone who is impossible to please, critical, judgmental, picky, and stubbornly closed-minded. These are symptoms of a disorder called obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD), but it's common for people to have subclinical levels of some or all of these qualities. Most of the time, it's best to avoid the difficult to please person, but what happens when he or she is a close family member, coworker, or even a spouse? It's still possible to maintain a positive relationship with the right tools. Impossible to Please, written by the authors of Toxic Coworkers, is a manual for dealing with these difficult people without sitting through stressful arguments, vicious insults and attacks, and passive-aggressive behavior. It empowers readers to take charge of the relationship and regain their dignity and confidence in interactions with these individuals. This book features specific strategies that are immediately effective when conversing with critical people and explains how readers can respond to unfair blame without becoming angry or overly defensive. By setting boundaries, improving communication, and asserting themselves, readers learn to deal with the impossible to please in romantic relationships, friendships, family, and work relationships.

When you are in a relationship with a critical partner—someone who constantly blames you and holds you to unrealistic standards—you may feel picked apart, unworthy, and unhappy. You may start to wonder if you'll ever be good enough for your partner. This guide can help you repair your relationship by getting to the root of why your partner criticizes you so that you both can build a more loving and supportive partnership. Based in schema therapy, The Critical Partner can help you gradually change unhealthy relationship patterns and help your partner move beyond the need to criticize. Through a series of assessment quizzes and worksheets, you'll learn what's driving your partner's behavior and what makes you vulnerable to critical attacks. You'll also discover alternative coping strategies for deflecting criticism and break the long-standing conflicts that keep you from moving forward as a couple. This book will help you get to the root of the problem so that you can repair your relationship and get the love you want.

The inspiring new book from the author of Emotional Bullshit reveals why no one is to blame-but everyone's accountable. For many, a rare day goes by in which the need to blame does not arise-be it to cover one's own errors or just to assign an unfortunate event some kind of name (i.e.,'If only X hadn't said X, we wouldn't be in this mess.') And even for those who are somewhat better at keeping the impulse in check-it is still there. According to psychologist Carl Alasko, blame is such an intrinsic part of how we humans communicate that we rarely take a look at what we're actually doing-and how it can affect our relationships. In this book, Alasko reveals that the need to assign blame when something bad happens stems from a very deep desire we all share to'see justice done'. Understandable when a grave crime has been committed, but it can become a dangerous habit if we begin to operate as though placing blame were somehow necessary if we want to change something or someone in our world. Yet this feeling that'someone has to pay'is seldom productive in initiating positive change. In Beyond Blame, Alasko teaches readers to recognize destruction that blame causes in their lives-oftentimes without their even being aware-and to put an end to it once and for all. The path to eliminating blame is not a quick or easy one but, as Carl Alasko demonstrates, it is a road that must be traveled if we hope to achieve true peace in our lives.

Includes index.