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Feelings of belonging are closely linked to feelings of self-esteem. This article examines whether these feelings are regulated in a similar manner. Research on self-esteem maintenance shows that self-enhancement strategies are interchangeable; self-esteem threats in one domain instigate indirect self-affirmations in unrelated domains that effectively replace needs to directly address the original threats. From this perspective, when self-esteem threats arise from a lack of belonging, indirect self-affirmations should again be both preferred and effective. However, belonging regulation may be distinct from self-esteem regulation. From this belonging maintenance perspective, indirect affirmations that enhance esteem, but do not directly repair belonging, may be relatively less preferred and effective following belonging threats. Supporting the belonging maintenance perspective, four studies demonstrated that whereas intelligence threats tended to elicit indirect self-affirmations, belonging threats elicited relatively more direct self-affirmations. Furthermore, whereas indirect affirmation strategies effectively repaired intelligence threats they did not effectively repair belonging threats.

Lonely individuals may decode social cues well but have difficulty putting such skills to use precisely when they need them—in social situations. In four studies, we examined whether lonely people choke under social pressure by asking participants to complete social sensitivity tasks framed as diagnostic of social skills or nonsocial skills. Across studies, lonely participants performed worse than nonlonely participants on social sensitivity tasks framed as tests of social aptitude, but they performed just as well or better than the nonlonely when the same tasks were framed as tests of academic aptitude. Mediational analyses in Study 3 and misattribution effects in Study 4 indicate that anxiety plays an important role in this choking effect. This research suggests that lonely individuals may not need to acquire social skills to escape loneliness; instead, they must learn to cope with performance anxiety in interpersonal interactions. [ABSTRACT FROM PUBLISHER]

Individuals sometimes alter their self-views to be more similar to others—traditionally romantic partners—because they are motivated to do so. A common motivating force is the desire to affiliate with a partner. The current research examined whether a different motivation—romantic jealousy—might promote individuals to alter their self-views to be more similar to a romantic rival, rather than a partner. Romantic jealousy occurs when individuals perceive a rival as a threat to their relationship and motivates individuals to defend their relationship. We proposed that one novel way that individuals might defend their relationship is by seeing themselves as more similar to a perceived romantic rival. We predicted individuals would alter their self-views to be more similar to a rival that they believed their partner found attractive. Importantly, we predicted that state romantic jealousy would motivate these self-alterations. Three studies confirmed these hypotheses. [ABSTRACT FROM PUBLISHER]

Lonely individuals typically fear negative evaluation and engage in overly cautious social behaviors that perpetuate their social isolation. Recent research has found analogous security-oriented (i.e., prevention-focused) responses following experiences highlighting concerns with social loss but differing growth-oriented (i.e., promotion-focused) responses, such as attempts at social engagement, following experiences highlighting concerns with social gain. The present studies thus investigated whether fostering a promotion focus among lonely individuals through subtle primes of acceptance could reduce their self-protective social avoidance. This hypothesis was supported across four studies in which the links between primed acceptance and promotion-focused motivations were first established, and the impact of such primes on lonely individuals' social thoughts, intentions, and behaviors were then tested. Implications of observed differences between effects of acceptance primes on lonely versus nonlonely individuals are discussed in terms of deficits versus satiation with feelings of belonging. [ABSTRACT FROM AUTHOR]