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Cultivate the self-awareness and understanding needed to earn your own secure attachment—so you can approach your life and your relationships with an open heart, a curious mind, and a joyful soul. Do you feel insecure, jealous, or anxious in your relationships? Do you have a deep fear that people will abandon you? Have you ever stayed in a toxic situation because you didn't believe you deserved better? If so, you may have an anxious attachment style—a way of coping with difficult situations or emotions that is often rooted in an adverse childhood experience (ACE), such as neglect or abuse. Fortunately, there are ways to heal this anxious attachment, and even transform it into an earned secure attachment. In this holistic guide, therapist Jennifer Nurick offers a trauma-informed approach grounded in neuroscience, mindfulness, and polyvagal theory to help you feel more secure in who you are; cultivate self-worth, self-trust, and confidence; and approach your life and relationships from a place of calm, clarity, and connectedness. You'll also learn to release your anxious fear of abandonment, move past reactivity and critical self-talk, and curb the negative impulses that sabotage healthy connections with others and keep you trapped in unhealthy relationships and situations. An insecure, anxious attachment style often springs from an unmet need for security, calm, and understanding in childhood. But you don't have to let your past define you. You can build healthy self-awareness, trust, and empathy; as well as the ability to regulate your emotions, respond to stress, solve problems, and form secure and trusting relationships with others. This book will guide you in doing just that.

“A resource that every therapist, client, and person needs in their life.”—Dr. Nicole LePera, New York Times-bestselling author of How to Do the Work and creator of The Holistic Psychologist on InstagramUnlock the key to deeply satisfying relationships and create the love you want with this fun and practical workbook from Eli Harwood, aka The Attachment Nerd. A licensed therapist and viral TikTok star, Harwood will help you navigate the path to an intimate, secure relationship with your sweetheart. Grounded in attachment theory research, Securely Attached clearly and gently guides you in delving deeper and overcoming problematic patterns that are holding you back from getting—and keeping—the close, fulfilling relationship you want. 140 insightful prompts will help you:• IDENTIFY YOUR ATTACHMENT PATTERNS. Understand which four categories inform your close relationships and why. • HEAL PAST WOUNDS. Reflect and process your unique attachment story for a perspective shift.• DEVELOP TOOLS FOR GROWTH. Quizzes, exercises, and tips provide actionable steps to learning secure patterns.• LOVE SECURELY. Find, build, and nurture healthy ways of loving—and being loved.With this workbook, you will come to understand your attachment story and how to move forward into the kind of connection with loved ones you want now and in the future. Transform insecure attachment patterns and unlock the key to deeply satisfying relationships with this insightful journal. Securely Attached is your guide to creating the love you want now!

Love, Intimacy and Online Dating: How a Global Pandemic Redefined Romantic Relationships is an innovative work that explores the concept of intimacy during the COVID-19 pandemic. The book provides an overview of the online dating world and apps, the use of which gradually became common as the pandemic restricted people's interaction in the physical world. The author's extensive research conducted during the pandemic posits a comprehensive understanding of the individual's motivation to join a dating app and explores its varied aspects.This thoroughly researched book explores the themes and elements of online dating and examines the users'motivation for joining a dating app, for seeking intimacy as well as for self-presentation on the app. Portolan examines the underlying politics and role of infrastructure of dating apps and describes how gender, power, and intimacy intersect to create new intimacy phenomena. She also utilises her research to put forth the key concept of'Jagged Love', which describes a user's cyclical relationship with dating apps during the pandemic, and the gap between a user's act to seek familiar romantic narratives and the app's inability to deliver against these ideas. The chapters further explore the differences between virtual and In Real Life (IRL) intimacy, the generation of gender and the emanation of stereotypical cultural ideals that the users sought through the apps. The book serves as an invaluable discussion on the pandemic's impact on modifying the definitions of romance and intimacy.This book will be useful for highlighting the impact social factors can have on familiar concepts and the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic on the definition of love and intimacy, making it fascinating for students, academics and professionals interested in relationships, digital media and gender. It will also be useful in enhancing the comprehension of love and romance in the fields of social science.

Empaths are highly sensitive and feel other people's energies and emotions as if they were their own. Uniquely intuitive and hyper-perceptive, empaths are also more sensitive to collective energy, the energy of spaces, and in some cases even physical stimuli like noise. Interacting with the world so intimately is a blessing, yet it also means your relationship strategies as an empath—not just regarding romantic love, but in all areas—must be navigated thoughtfully. Romantic partners, friends, coworkers, and family members all present opportunities for uncommonly close connections, though empaths might fall into rescuing, codependency, or people-pleasing as unhealthy relationship coping skills. Instead, learn to: • More mindfully choose between feeling with others or staying in your own energy and emotions. • Support loved ones from a place of healthy detachment and discernment. • Be more assertive about getting your needs and desires met. • Protect and nourish your sensitive system. • Understand and maximize your intuition. • Nurture your relationships to create more healing intimacy. • Engage with collective energy in an empowered way to be of service and live with more purpose. Author and professional intuitive Tanya Carroll Richardson has worked with thousands of empath clients from all over the world. Here she presents a guide to relationships of all kinds with empaths and sensitives specifically in mind, complete with quizzes, interactive exercises, and helpful mantras that make this book a valuable resource for connecting with yourself as well as creating more fulfilling interactions with others.

Spiritual writer and founder of Rising Woman, Sheleana Aiyana takes you on a transformational inner-work journey to heal life-long relationship pattens and reclaim power over your life.Romantic relationships have the ability to infuse our lives with the magic of intimacy and connection. But for many of us, that magic is fleeting–over and over, our relationships don't last, or if they do, they fail to make us happy. We find ourselves chasing unavailable love, sublimating our needs in service to others, or trying to save our partners from themselves, all the while abandoning the one who needs us most–ourselves.If you find yourself struggling to let go after a relationship ends, or you keep hitting the same wall in dating and relationships with emotionally unavailable people, this is not a sign that you are broken. It is a sign that somewhere along the way, you learned to sacrifice yourself in order to be loved. In Becoming the One, spiritual leader and visionary founder of the Rising Woman community Sheleana Aiyana offers a roadmap for transforming your relationship patterns to end the cycle of self-abandonment and move into the light of self-discovery. You'll learn to:• build a secure, loving relationship with yourself.• connect with your inner child.• challenge your core beliefs about love.• set self-affirming boundaries.• discover and celebrate your true desires.• recognize red and green flags.Sheleana's revolutionary lessons, based on wisdom from the traumas of her past and years of guiding thousands of women around the world in her internationally acclaimed'Becoming the One'program of spiritual and therapeutic healing practices, teach you to embody the qualities you are seeking in others so that you can become'the one'for yourself. You'll learn how to trust your body, make peace with your past, and clear the path for healthy, conscious love–one that returns the authority to you to choose how to live and whom to love.The desire for love is wired into the very fibers of our being, but before you can create rewarding bonds with others, first you must stand wholeheartedly in self-acceptance. Becoming the One is an invitation to find your way home to yourself.

Be Not Afraid of Love is a stunning collection of interconnected essays and affirmations that follow Mimi Zhu's journey toward embodying and re-learning love after a violent relationship. In their early twenties, queer Chinese-Australian writer and artist Mimi Zhu was a survivor of intimate-partner abuse. This left them broken, in search of ways to heal and find love again. They found that in words. In sharing their own intimate encounters with oppression, healing, joy and community, Mimi invites readers all over the world to reflect deeply on their own experiences, with the intention of acting as a guide to undoing the hurt or uncertainty within them. This book is a continuation of that re-learning, exploring the intersections of love and fear in self-esteem, friendship, family dynamics and romantic relationships, and extending out to its effects on society and the greater political realm. Mimi's powerful and provocative words will guide and inspire readers to lean into love with softness. Heartrending and revolutionary, Be Not Afraid of Love is a testament to the strength and adaptability all humans possess, and a tribute to love in all its forms.

SHORTLISTED FOR THE HEALTH & WELLBEING AWARDS 2022'Anna is THE go-to on all things dating and relationships. There is just no one with better knowledge, balanced wisdom and experience than her.'- Katie Piper''Whether you are single, dating or in it for the long haul, tips and solutions for all the common dating and relationship problems are here.'- Louise Pentland''Straight-up, professional and practical advice.... where has this book been all my life!?'- Dr Ranj Singh'Anna manages to balance speaking openly about matters of the heart without preaching. It's a 21st century bible for anyone - singles, couples, throuples - looking for love.'- Anna Whitehouse'A brilliant bible for anyone at any stage of their relationship.'- Lucie Cave----From Celebs Go Dating's relationship expert Anna Williamson comes the must-read guide to navigating love.Whether you're fed up of the single life, wanting to dip your toe into the dating world, or perhaps you're a marriage or long-term relationship veteran, Anna shares advice, tips and techniques for all your dating and relationship needs:– Boosting confidence and building self-esteem.– How to go from seeing each other to being with each other.– Feeling empowered – identifying and setting boundaries.– From bicker to barney – arguing dos and don'ts.– Three's a crowd? Baby-proofing your relationship.– Saying and doing things better by communicating effectively.– Tackling the tricky topics – from sex and intimacy to dividing the household chores.This is your personal pocket guide to help steer you into the right love lane.

'This breakthrough book changes dating forever. Now you can find The One with your eyes wide open.'-Jack Canfield, New York Times bestselling co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul® and The Success Principles™Practical results-oriented guide to finding the right type of man for you - and weeding out the rest'Kiss Fewer Frogs: The Fast Track Secret to Your Fairy Tale Ending'What if you could skip all the bad dates and failed relationships on the way to meeting Mr. Right? What if you could recognize the men who are wrong for you within minutes of meeting them, rather than finding out months or years later?So many women date - and sometimes marry - the wrong man, missing opportunities for happiness and wasting time in the process. Now best-selling author James Sheridan shares a revolutionary new approach to fast-tracking relationship bliss - and short-circuiting heartbreak. After decades of success as a relationship coach and countless conversations with women in audiences around the world, Sheridan now shares the secrets that have changed the lives of thousands of women.'For both men and women,'he writes,'romantic relationships are the foundations of a fulfilled life, so why should you go about getting one in such a haphazard fashion?'Based on years of research in psychology, science, and the principles of compatibility and chemistry,'Kiss Fewer Frogs'empowers a woman to identify which men are best suited to her and where to find him.Unlike generic dating advice, the core of the book digs deep into seven types of men:'genetypes'of behavior, personality, and character identified by psychologists, scientists, and even spiritual leaders. Which asset does each genetype bring into a relationship? What do they dislike? What drives them? How likely will they call you back promptly? Where does each type hang out? One of those seven types is invariably likely to be your type and this ground-breaking guide can help you find him.With wit, warmth, and sometimes bold comments, the author also gives women rare insights into the male psyche and takes on topics rarely encountered in similar guides:'Prince Perfect'and revelations designed to shred artificial worldviewsThe one thing single mothers should avoidSix characteristics of women who attract menRewriting the dating script for better focus and more controlThe power of appreciating your age, body and looksTips on writing better online profilesThe'Calls of Nature'for both sexes Woven into this step-by-step guide are stories of real men and women in their search for romance, humorous anecdotes, and reflections on dating relationships that the author overheard'last night at a bar (aka my alternate research lab).'Whether he is sharing how to recognize a'player'with surgical precision or assigning women to write down their deepest relationship fears, Sheridan motivates readers to give love a chance.Imagine having proven strategies to let yourself learn from the past and move forward to the future with greater confidence and trust. If you - or women you know - are ready to take your best shot at identifying compatible men who are serious about finding a life partner,'Kissing Fewer Frogs'will make the search both systematic and fun. The perfect prince doesn't exist, but you may very well discover a prince who's close to perfect for you.

A powerful CBT approach to help you find freedom from obsessive relationship anxiety, doubt, and fear of commitmentDo you obsess over your partner's flaws? Does thinking about the future of your relationship leave you imagining the worst-case scenario? When it comes to navigating the world of romantic relationships, some feelings of anxiety, doubt, and fear are to be expected. But if your fears so extreme that they threaten to destroy an otherwise healthy relationship, you may have relationship OCD—a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) that causes chronic obsessive doubt and anxiety in relationships. So, how can you free yourself to discover deeper intimacy and security?Relationship OCD offers an evidence-based, cognitive behavioral approach to finding relief from relationship anxiety, obsessive doubt, and fear of commitment. You'll learn to challenge the often-distorted thought patterns that trigger harmful emotions, increase your ability to think rationally, and ultimately accept the presence of intrusive thinking while maintaining the values of a healthy relationship.Relationships are the ultimate unknown. If you're ready to let go of needing to know for sure, this book will help you find satisfaction and thrive in your romantic relationships—in all their wonderful uncertainty.

A road map for building strong and secure relationships for those who struggle with anxiety in their romantic connections.An estimated 47 million Americans identify as having an anxious attachment style, which can make being in relationships turbulent and emotionally taxing for them. According to groundbreaking research in the field of attachment, anxious types are more prone to insecurity, jealousy, codependency, and other behaviors that get in the way of finding and sustaining love. In Anxiously Attached, seasoned psychotherapist and couples counselor Jessica Baum guides readers through understanding their attachment style at its core and building the inner strength and self-love that will lead them to more secure and satisfying relationships. Developed over ten years in private practice, Baum's signature Self-full® Method has helped her clients get off the toxic roller coaster of anxious attachment and discover the secure and mutually supportive relationships they deserve. In this book readers will learn how to: Create boundaries to safeguard their sense of self-sovereignty in relationshipsCommunicate to their partners what they need to feel safe and secure in the relationshipDevelop a secure sense of self-worth and emotional stabilityLearn the true meaning of a healthy/interdependent relationship and how to establish one with their partner or future partner.Discover a compassionate path towards healing through experiences like mediation practices where they can start to develop more insight into their internal landscape.Attain a deep understanding of the anxious-avoidant dance that is extremely common in intimacy struggles. Anxiously Attached offers a practical and holistic approach for overcoming anxious attachment issues to discover happier, more fulfilling relationships.

“This book might just change your life”―Sunday Times'Wise, wonderful, moving and brilliant... will leave your heart in a much better place”―StylistAfter years of feeling that love was always out of reach, journalist Natasha Lunn set out to understand how relationships work and evolve over a lifetime. She turned to authors and experts to learn about their experiences, as well as drawing on her own, asking: How do we find love? How do we sustain it? And how do we survive when we lose it?In Conversations on Love she began to find the answers:Dolly Alderton on vulnerabilityStephen Grosz on accepting changeCandice Carty-Williams on friendshipLisa Taddeo on the loneliness of lossDiana Evans on parenthoodEmily Nagoski on the science of sexAlain de Botton on the psychology of being aloneEsther Perel on unrealistic expectationsRoxane Gay on redefining romanceand many more...

This book explores the ethical and psychological dilemmas connected to the lived experiences of love, uniquely proposing an ethical framework that can be applied in loving relationships. The book provides an introduction to the study of ethics, moral psychology, and ancient philosophy. Examining key themes of love, such as unconditional love, romantic love, anger, desperation, and fairness, this book offers the reader a way to exercise and strengthen their personal critical thinking on ethical dilemmas, especially in relation to loving feelings. The author believes that ethics is the heart of love in the same way as logic is the brain of reasoning; we do not need ethics to love but we can love in a much healthier way if we train our ethical skills to love. After laying the theoretical framework for the book, chapters are organized into themes relating to ethical problems and begin with an exemplary piece from Greek and Latin literature. Using these writings as a starting point, Susi Ferrarello discusses whether it is possible to have a sound ethical theory of love, especially in cases relating to justice, despair, and rage, and demonstrates how this framework can be applied in new and established relationships. Filled with case studies throughout, spiritual exercises are listed at the end of chapters to help the reader increase their understanding of love and their ethical choices surrounding emotional dilemmas. This interdisciplinary book is essential reading for undergraduate and graduate students who take classes on ethics, marriage and family therapy, psychology, philosophy, classics, ancient philosophy, and politics, as well as those interested in the ethics of love and emotional decision-making.

NEW YORK TIMES, WALL STREET JOURNAL, AND USA TODAY BESTSELLER • Stop working on yourself as an individual and start working on your relationship as a couple, with the help of the renowned family therapist and author of The New Rules of Marriage “This book is a road map for all of us who seek true intimacy.”—GWYNETH PALTROW, founder and CEO of goopONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: The Wall Street JournalNot much is harder than figuring out how to love your partner in all their messy humanness—and there's also not much that's more important. At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results: repetitive fights that go nowhere, or a distant relationship in which partners end up living “alone together.” With deft insight, humor, and charm, Real guides you to transform your relationship into one that's based on compassion, collaboration, and closeness. Us is a groundbreaking guide to a new science-backed skillset—one that will allow you to get past your knee-jerk reactions and tap into your wiser, more collaborative self. With a novelist's flair, Real shares the stories of couples whose relationships have been saved by these skills and pans out to the culture that reinforces our dysfunction. If you and your partner are backed into separate corners of “you” and “me,” this book will show the way back to “us.” With Us, your true relationship can begin.

The definitive guide for defeating anxious, anxious-avoidant, and avoidant attachment issues; dealing with the drama triangle; and building stronger, more successful relationships.Written by a behavioral relationship expert, Overcoming Insecure Attachment provides actionable steps on how to overcome insecure attachment styles and the problems they spawn with self-value, self-awareness and self-responsibility. Going beyond what traditional attachment theory books focus on, readers will follow eight proven steps that they can customize and organize in the way that best suits their unique needs, all the while being bolstered and championed by Tracy Crossley's friendly, bold tone. Permanently stop fear and anxiety from smothering the way you live your life, and stop settling for relationships that aren't right for you. Overcoming Insecure Attachment will teach you how to break down your subconscious beliefs and create emotional connections with yourself and others for a happier, better life.

Sometimes we have HUGE expectations for the ideal relationship, but dating isn't about being perfect or catching the perfect partner; it's all about creating compassionate self-awareness and stronger self-esteem. A must-read for daters, this no-nonsense guide from clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, PhD, takes the guesswork out of dating with real-life examples, the latest research, and 33 vital mindset shifts designed to foster: empowered communication,strong, healthy boundaries,realistic, mindful expectations,increased red flag awareness,healthy dating dynamics, and more! Self-discovery is key to healthy relationships. Your life will change when you discover how to date strong, date fearlessly, and date smart.

“Hilarious.” —Cosmopolitan A laugh-out-loud, tongue-in-cheek guidebook filled with hilarious and helpful advice—from how to dodge family members'unwanted questions about babies to successfully creating a fake partner during wedding season—for anyone trying to survive and thrive in the midst of singledom. Perfect for fans of Hey Ladies! and Single State of Mind.So, you're single. Whether existing sans partner is a new state of being or you've been on this solo journey for a while, the fact of the matter is this: being single is actually awesome. You can do whatever you want, travel wherever you want, and be your truest, most free self. But there are a lot of people out there—your mom, your married best friend, the wedding industry, society—who see things differently. To them, singledom is something to avoid at all cost, no matter how many times you tell them you love your life the way it is. The limit does not exist when it comes to telling Aunt Carol you still don't want to be set up with her neighbor's ex-stepson. Now, Melissa Croce gives you the tips, tricks, and sage advice you need to graciously endure all of the cringe-worthy scenarios your single self may dread, from awkward small talk with an ex to navigating well-meaning but insensitive relatives. And it helps you truly flourish in your singledom, offering activities like quizzes aimed at helping you find a new hobby and tarot spreads for that cozy Saturday night in. Part real-world guide, part commiseration, and part celebration, Single and Forced to Mingle will steer you through the ups and downs of being single, reminding you just how good it feels to be free.

Discover the three types of love--and the key to finding the one you're truly meant to be with.We love and we love again -- sometimes our hearts get broken but, somehow, we find the courage to dive back in. In this soul-searching book, relationship expert Kate Rose guides readers down the path to a deeper understanding of who they are, what they want, and finally, to the discovery of their Twin Flame. According to Rose, love is a journey of self-discovery and every relationship we have in our lives teaches us something that we need to learn about ourselves and what will make us truly happy. She introduces readers to the three types of love we will all experience:The Soulmate introduces us to the dream of love, but somehow what seemed like it would be'happily ever after'wasn't meant to last forever. We are so consumed with making The Karmic Love work that we often fail to question whether it should work. As painful as it is to accept, this love that felt so right in the beginning is actually all wrong.The Twin Flame comes into our lives and often we don't even know it's love because... it's too easy. This is the love who helps us to accept ourselves just as we are because this is precisely what they do. In You Only Fall in Love Three Times, Kate Rose shows us that happy endings may not happen quite the way they do in fairytales-- but they happen nonetheless.

In this innovative and user-friendly guide, Crystal Wilhite Hemesath identifies the factors that lead to relationship breakdown and suggests key strategies for the prevention and treatment of falling out of romantic love (FORL). Grounded in research and two decades of clinical experience, Falling Out of Romantic Love outlines strategies for preparing and maintaining healthy, enduring, romantic relationships as well as what to do when FORL becomes a threat. Applicable to daily life, and relevant to a wide range of scenarios, this book contains a plethora of information for individuals just beginning an intimate partner relationship, long-married couples, or for those simply curious about romantic relationships and the problems that may arise. Helpful tips are also provided for individuals trying to decide if they should remain in a relationship and for those experiencing heartbreak on the receiving end of FORL.Rich in real-life examples, this book arms professionals with a greater understanding of why people fall out of romantic love. It's an indispensable guide for marriage and family therapists, as well as other mental health professionals or clergy looking to incorporate additional tools and clinical interventions into their work.

ARE YOUR POSSESSIONS TRASHING YOUR LOVE LIFE? In this book, Suzanne Roynon shows you how stuff can trap you in relationship misery. If you're single or your romantic relationship simply isn't working out, using the Interiors Therapy process will transform your experience. Suzanne explains: How certain possessions impact on love Evaluating clutter is only part of the problem Activating change in nine key parts of your life Recognising the power of positive intention Transforming romance with your Manifesto for Love™ Become enlightened both physically and emotionally to inspire the loving relationship you deserve.

Are you fed up with thinking about that guy every minute of every waking hour, when he doesn't even reply to your texts?Are you reeling from the pain of a break-up, unsure of where to turn?Are you single and looking to be happy with your choices in the face of society's constant questioning?In How to Get Over a Boy, bestselling author Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them.In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of ‘how to make him find you hot!', ‘how to make him jealous!', ‘how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being ‘the prize'.Men are NEVER the prize. You are. Let The Slumflower show you why.

A fresh approach to matters of the heart, Relationships offers practical skills and new attitudes for a more mature vision of love. Since around 1750, we have been living in the era of Romanticism, which has shaped the way we approach love, marriage, and sex. When it comes to love, this book argues, Romanticism has been a disaster. Full of real-life examples, lively humor, and cultural anecdotes, Relationships teaches us: That love and sex may not always go together (and that's OK)That discussing money early on, in a serious way, is not a betrayal of loveThat acknowledging respective flaws can be a couple's superpowerThat we will never find everything we need in another personThat spending two hours discussing whether bathroom towels should be hung up or can be left on the floor has its own dignityWith wisdom, wit, and compassion, this innovative guide paves the way to a new, brighter future for love.LEARN THE SKILL OF LOVE a refreshing, skills-based take on how to approach relationships.PRACTICAL RELATIONSHIP ADVICE that challenges many preconceived assumptions.HARDCOVER WITH RIBBON MARKER beautifully produced, premium gift format.

Navigate the challenges of a blended family with children to fortify your marriage for lasting happiness and understanding. The Happy Stepcouple is a comprehensive and practical self-help book designed to help couples with children from prior relationships thrive despite the complexity of stepfamily life. More than two thirds of stepcouple relationships break up within the first few years of committing to each other. With these terrible odds, every stepcouple needs an arsenal of tools necessary to sustain a loving relationship. The Happy Stepcouple gives them everything they need to navigate complex stepfamily dynamics with confidence and kindness, allowing them to build a happy, fulfilling life together.Drawing on the insights and strategies developed from the author's 30 years of working as a marriage and family therapist specializing in treating stepfamilies, this work also includes the personal accounts of many stepcouples who describe their stepfamily problems along with how they handled them.Utilizing the most current research in attachment theory, psychology, communication, and marriage and family therapy, Rachelle Katz offers a grounded approach to overcoming problems stepcouples experience by examining the two primary reasons why so many of these relationships get in trouble: Partners'inability to understand, agree to, and fulfill each other's unspoken needs and expectations, and communication styles during conflicts that increase each partner's insecurity levels and weakens their emotional connection to each other. Both of these factors fray emotional bonds—bonds that already are stressed by stepfamily challenges. Here, stepcouples learn how to establish realistic stepfamily expectations as well as identify and modify harmful communication patterns, essential elements needed to strengthen their emotional bond.

The stories, questions, and aftermath of relationships, from real people around the world. Romance is hard work. It can also be exhilarating, amusing, weird, crazy, and simply exhausting. We've all had our share of awkward and uncomfortable dates (and some amazing ones) as well as mystifying and confusing break-ups.Born out of the viral KoreVoices storytelling project, thousands of stories have poured in from all over the world. The submissions cover every aspect of dating—crushes, heartbreak, uncertainty, guilt, a never-ending array of bizarre situations, and the long road to healing.Technology is playing an enormous role in changing the way we meet, date, and interact with one another. It has forced people to think differently and expect the unexpected anytime they step out for a date. This book tells the story of modern-day romance through the words of those who are experiencing it first-hand.

The most popular, provocative, and unforgettable essays from the past fifteen years of the New York Times “Modern Love” column—including stories from the anthology series starring Tina Fey, Andy Garcia, Anne Hathaway, Catherine Keener, Dev Patel, and John SlatteryA young woman goes through the five stages of ghosting grief. A man's promising fourth date ends in the emergency room. A female lawyer with bipolar disorder experiences the highs and lows of dating. A widower hesitates about introducing his children to his new girlfriend. A divorcée in her seventies looks back at the beauty and rubble of past relationships. These are just a few of the people who tell their stories in Modern Love, Revised and Updated, featuring dozens of the most memorable essays to run in The New York Times “Modern Love” column since its debut in 2004. Some of the stories are unconventional, while others hit close to home. Some reveal the way technology has changed dating forever; others explore the timeless struggles experienced by anyone who has ever searched for love. But all of the stories are, above everything else, honest. Together, they tell the larger story of how relationships begin, often fail, and—when we're lucky—endure. Edited by longtime “Modern Love” editor Daniel Jones and featuring a diverse selection of contributors, this is the perfect book for anyone who's loved, lost, stalked an ex on social media, or pined for true romance: In other words, anyone interested in the endlessly complicated workings of the human heart.Featuring essays by: Veronica Chambers • Terri Cheney • Deborah Copaken • Trey Ellis • Jean Hanff Korelitz • Ann Hood • Mindy Hung • Amy Krouse Rosenthal • Ann Leary • Andrew Rannells • Larry Smith • Ayelet Waldman • and more!

Let's face it, relationships are hard. If you're like many people, your relationship résumé reads something like a spatter pattern. Confusing experiences lie in your wake, and you can't decipher the learning. Maybe your relationship is littered with messy conflicts or scorched by the ills of the world. Maybe you are lonely—and looking for a partner, or you feel you just aren't any good at relationships—and you want to get better. Using stories from her own colorful relationship life and from her work with clients from diverse backgrounds around the world, Jan Dworkin, PhD, lays bare her missteps and triumphs both in and out of the bedroom with honesty, humor, and depth. She offers concrete tools to help couples navigate power dynamics and conflicts that arise from differences in gender, class, race, sexual desire, communication styles, dreams and opposing points of view. Through sassy stories, step-by-step exercises, and hard-earned wisdom, Dworkin guides readers to build their very own'relationship practice.'Whether you are embarking on a new relationship, striving to improve an existing one, or recouping after a breakup, prepare yourself to laugh, cry, and gain the education of a lifetime. This is the real world of relationships with no holds barred.

The fault lines that can fracture a marriage are all contained in these six words: FAMILIARITY, FIGHTING, FAMILY, FINANCES, FOOLING AROUND AND FINDING HELP. It's time to get to know your F words. Using the latest scientific research, personal anecdotes and expert advice, award-winning journalist Belinda Luscombe argues that marriage is good for your health, your finances and your happiness. But it isn't always easy! Focusing on what Belinda describes as her F words, she presents facts, debunks myths, and provides an entertaining mix of data, anecdotes and wisdom from a wide range of approaches to married life, drawing on the work of experts from within the marriage and divorce industries. A brilliant guide to staying together, Marriageology offers helpful advice and gives readers something to think about whether your marriage is on the brink of collapse or just needs a bit of maintenance.

A vital guide to overcome the barriers to achieving intimacy and meaningful connection.People in resilient relationships are co-owners, experience reciprocity, and are better prepared to meet challenges authentically and effectively. In this sequel to the best-selling Irrelationship, the authors use examples from their clinical practice to review the concept of irrelationship and expand the DREAM Sequence, a tool used by affected couples to address perennial relationship issues.By mutually and mindfully viewing the relationship as a third entity, separate from each individual, couples will learn how to live in and with the ambiguity of empathy, intimacy, vulnerability, and emotional investment and view relationship sanity as a deliberate and joyful undertaking to maintain and deepen connection.

Find Hope With This Collection of True Stories of Lasting RomanceThe surprising beginnings of true love: You never know when it might happen: love might be right around the corner, down the block, or across the aisle from you on your next flight. Stories of how people met are endlessly fascinating and they remind us that we all need to be ready for anything, including meeting the love of your life when you least expect it.Healing stories of serendipitous romance: After a bad break up, composer and beloved songwriter David Friedman embarked on a decade-long journey collecting couple's stories of “how they met” as a therapeutic project. What Friedman learned was utterly surprising?there was always an element of serendipity, planning had nothing to do with it. Along the way, what started out as a path to moving forward became a mission to better understand matters of the heart.Romantic biographies and real-life relationships: In this study of true romance, Friedman talks to people from every walk of life, from devout churchgoers to same sex couples to celebrities. Among others, How They Metshares the moving stories of how Lucie Arnaz met her famous mate, Lawrence Luckinbill, and the unexpected story of Kathie Lee and Frank Gifford's friendship turning to romance.How They Met gives readers:Real life stories that will give hope to even the most heart broken.A truly diverse set of stories that shows the universality of true love.A close-up look at the romances and relationships of famous couples.This collection of true stories will have you believing that love will find YOU – perhaps when you least expect it!

From Jane Austen to Taylor Swift, a look at the surprising politics of romantic love and its dissolution. Whatever the underlying motives – be they love, financial security, or mere masochism – the fact is that getting involved in a romantic partnership is emotionally, morally, and even politically fraught. In Hard To Do, Kelli María Korducki turns a Marxist lens on the relatively short history of romantic partnership, tracing how the socio-economic dynamics between men and women have transformed the ways women conceive of domestic partnership. With perceptive, reported insights on the ways marriage and divorce are legislated, the rituals of twentieth-century courtship, and contemporary practices for calling it off, Korducki reveals that, for all women, choosing to end a relationship is a radical action with very limited cultural precedent.

People have been sharing their life stories with psychologist Allison Keating for the past eighteen years, and the words she hears most often are'I feel overwhelmed,'followed by'I thought I'd have it figured out by now.'Adulthood is tough. As we try to divide ourselves between our partner, children, parents, siblings, friends and colleagues, it is no wonder we can feel overwhelmed, often neglecting the most important relationship of all – the one we have with ourselves.The Secret Life of Adults invites you to audit and improve your seven key relationships, looking at how the experiences of your past impact on who you are today.Ask yourself: - Who are you in your relationships? - Are they supportive, nourishing and empowering – or draining and filled with anxiety? - Is there a big gap between your public and private self? - What are your expectations of others and of yourself? - Do you understand why you react to certain comments from family or friends? - Do you repeat patterns of behaviour in your relationships?The Secret Life of Adults has exercises and techniques to help you get to know yourself better and understand why you behave as you do in each part of your life, allowing you to unlock the secret to less stressful and more meaningful relationships.

A psychologist specializing in couples therapy provides an honest and compassionate guide to dealing with a spouse's or partner's love affair, from the one-night stand to the grand amour.As a result of innovative technologies and a globalized world, temptation and opportunity often intersect, allowing infidelity to increasingly create problems between spouses, partners, and other couplings in which at least one person expects exclusive intimacy. In this timely work, noted couples therapist Joel Block examines the challenges of affairs, including types of affairs; their motivations and effects; and how to repair and improve a relationship, or part ways, after an affair. Questions addressed include:'What is the motivation?','Is it a result of deep dissatisfaction? Or not a reflection of the relationship at all?', and'Can relationships be affair-proofed?'Providing vignettes from the author's therapy sessions to illustrate points, the book also explains how to respond to discovery; minimize disruption in the lives of children; and when separation or divorce is the chosen solution, understand new modes of'conscious de-coupling'that keep post-breakup life stable as well as satisfying. A lifeline for recovering from crisis, this text will interest general readers looking for advice to react to, cope with, or avoid infidelity, as well as students and professionals in the fields of psychology, counseling, and social work.

From the world's most romantic city comes this enchanting guide to passion and love. Three chic Parisian women share their secrets for every stage of romance, from fleeting flirtations to the beginning of a relationship to partnerships that last a lifetime. Featuring tips on what to wear on a first date, where to go for a spontaneous romantic getaway, how to keep things hot between the sheets, and so much more, these pages give readers the tools to handle every amorous situation with allure and grace. Full of fashionable illustrations and bite-size advice delivered in a delightful tone, Love Parisienne is the super-chic guide to living and loving like a fabulous French woman.

Failure is failure. I had failed… miserably! I suck at break-ups but who doesn't? I was the guy next door who “had it all together!” But that's not what goes on inside. My experience had shame written all over it, a significant departure from the person I thought I was. Failing emotionally started a journey filled with the very real pain of heartbreak and the smothering cloud of depression. I discovered what vulnerability really was and how my generation ran from it. Search your own heart and find those scars. They never really heal but they become a better part of us. To get through a day you sometimes need some assurance that you are not alone. For those who need to know there is another day worth living, you're welcome to share this journey.

No one likes a know-it-all, but everyone loves a girl with brains and heart. The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory is an intelligent and comprehensive guide to polyamory, open relationships, and other forms of alternative love, offering relationship advice radically different from anything you'll find on the magazine rack.This practical guidebook will help women break free of the mold of traditional monogamy, without the constraints of jealousy, possessiveness, insecurity, and competition. The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory incorporates interviews and real-world advice from women of all ages in nontraditional relationships, as well as exercises for building self-awareness, confidence in communication, and strategies for managing and eliminating jealousy. If you're curious about exploring group sex, opening up your current monogamous relationship, or ready to “come out” as polyamorous, this book covers it all!Whether you're a seasoned graduate, a timid freshman, or somewhere in between, you'll learn how to discover and craft unique relationships that are healthy, happy, sexy, and tailor-made for you. Because when it comes to your love life, being a know-it-all is actually a great thing to be.

Turn Your Pain from Breakup into an Opportunity to Grow toward True LoveAfter her devastating breakup, counselor Rebekah Freedom McClaskey became inspired by her work in the field of addiction recovery to craft a safe, step-by-step path to forging healthy relationships based on honesty, love, integrity, and trust. Breakup Rehab addresses post-breakup chaos, providing clarity and direction so that your next relationship will be your best relationship.This wise, real-world, and often humorous guide acknowledges the state of grief or resignation that comes with a breakup and then walks you through the stages of forgiveness and letting go. Along the way, you'll experience a more compassionate self-awareness as you rebuild self-confidence and learn how to be loved for who you truly are. These steps will propel you forward on your unique path, as you recognize your life's purpose and then travel toward well-being and a love that will set you free.

Stop struggling and start loving again. Would you like to have a relationship built on love and trust? International author, entrepreneur, leading relationship expert and clinical psychologist Jacqui Christie shares her ground breaking techniques in this powerful book'Rewire Your Relationship'. In this book, Jacqui will show you how to truly understand your partner and resolve the conflict between your head and your heart. You will discover how to develop a deep and profound appreciation for each other, and experience more balance, harmony and joy in your relationship than ever before. You'll learn:- How to transform your relationship into a lasting source of love, intimate connection and companionship- How to empower each other with the confidence and tools to craft make-or-break moments and weather the key stages in your relationship- How to feel safe and secure with your partner- That there IS a way to repair your connection with each other- How to understand your partner's brain and why they keep doing the things they do- Why your attachment style plays such a vital role in your relationship- What your partner needs and how to give it to them. Finally, the relationship answers you've been searching for!

'A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of BooksFrom iconic couples'therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it.An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book.For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart.Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations.Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

“A beautifully written and well-researched cultural criticism as well as an honest memoir” (Los Angeles Review of Books) from the author of the popular New York Times essay, “To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This,” explores the romantic myths we create and explains how they limit our ability to achieve and sustain intimacy.What really makes love last? Does love ever work the way we say it does in movies and books and Facebook posts? Or does obsessing over those love stories hurt our real-life relationships? When her parents divorced after a twenty-eight year marriage and her own ten-year relationship ended, those were the questions that Mandy Len Catron wanted to answer. In a series of candid, vulnerable, and wise essays that takes a closer look at what it means to love someone, be loved, and how we present our love to the world, “Catron melds science and emotion beautifully into a thoughtful and thought-provoking meditation” (Bookpage). She delves back to 1944, when her grandparents met in a coal mining town in Appalachia, to her own dating life as a professor in Vancouver. She uses biologists'research into dopamine triggers to ask whether the need to love is an innate human drive. She uses literary theory to show why we prefer certain kinds of love stories. She urges us to question the unwritten scripts we follow in relationships and looks into where those scripts come from. And she tells the story of how she decided to test an experiment that she'd read about—where the goal was to create intimacy between strangers using a list of thirty-six questions—and ended up in the surreal situation of having millions of people following her brand-new relationship. “Perfect fodder for the romantic and the cynic in all of us” (Booklist), How to Fall in Love with Anyone flips the script on love. “Clear-eyed and full of heart, it is mandatory reading for anyone coping with—or curious about—the challenges of contemporary courtship” (The Toronto Star).

“After years of debate and inquiry, the key to a great marriage remained shrouded in mystery. Until now...”—Carol Dweck, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of SuccessEli J. Finkel's insightful and ground-breaking investigation of marriage clearly shows that the best marriages today are better than the best marriages of earlier eras. Indeed, they are the best marriages the world has ever known. He presents his findings here for the first time in this lucid, inspiring guide to modern marital bliss.The All-or-Nothing Marriage reverse engineers fulfilling marriages—from the “traditional” to the utterly nontraditional—and shows how any marriage can be better.The primary function of marriage from 1620 to 1850 was food, shelter, and protection from violence; from 1850 to 1965, the purpose revolved around love and companionship. But today, a new kind of marriage has emerged, one oriented toward self-discover, self-esteem, and personal growth. Finkel combines cutting-edge scientific research with practical advice; he considers paths to better communication and responsiveness; he offers guidance on when to recalibrate our expectations; and he even introduces a set of must-try “lovehacks.”This is a book for the newlywed to the empty nester, for those thinking about getting married or remarried, and for anyone looking for illuminating advice that will make a real difference to getting the most out of marriage today.

It's only natural: people are fundamentally social creatures, yearning for close, meaningful bonds with others. We crave and consequently forge human relationships that give our lives meaning. In fact, thousands of studies have linked the quality of people's closest relationships to better health, longevity, and well-being. Many questions arise when we ponder what makes a good relationship. How should we handle conflict? What roles do trust and commitment play?In The Science of Relationships, TIME delves into the mysteries of connection in three parts--romance, family, and friends--in a series of articles and essays. In'Love in the Age of Like,'actor and comedian Aziz Ansari ruminates on his parent's arranged marriage what the myriad of options online dating opens up means for modern love. Next we break down'The Science of Flirting'and follow up with a guide to'Do-It-Yourself Couples Counseling.'In the family section, we prove that your annoying brothers and sisters really do help in the long run with'Why Siblings Make Us Better.'Whether relationships are the joy of your life or bane of your existence, The Science of Relationships will teach you more about growing strong bonds.

Love: The Psychology of Attraction is an easy-to-navigate, step-by-step guide to modern love that's grounded in scientific study, psychological expertise, and practical insights about romance in the age of social media.Crack the code of compatibility and find the path to true love with this unique guide to finding the perfect mate in the modern world. Love: The Psychology of Attraction offers answers to your burning questions: How should I present myself online? What are red flags in a first phone call? Is it time to meet family members? And it answers some unexpected questions, too: Is chemistry predictable? Do I have a'lifestyle type'?With every quiz, assessment, and inviting infographic, Love: The Psychology of Attraction guides you toward deeper, more satisfying relationships that can lead to long-term fulfillment.

Bust the Myths to Build a Great Relationship According to bestselling authors and relationship counselors Linda and Charlie Bloom, accepting common myths such as “couples with great relationships don't fight” or “little things aren't worth getting upset over” can prevent you from building the strong relationship you hope for. This book offers compelling stories and valuable suggestions for replacing myths with realistic expectations, equipping you with behavior and communication guidelines that will enhance and strengthen your intimate relationship. With the Blooms'strong yet flexible approach to love, you'll discover a new openness in which mutual understanding can thrive.

“Every woman who is struggling to understand the mistreatment she is experiencing in her relationship should begin by reading [this] wonderful book.”—Lundy Bancroft, author of Why Does He Do That? What do you do when the one you love hurts you? Have you been searching for answers to difficult questions about your relationship? Do you feel confused about why your partner seems loving one moment and angry the next? Summoning the courage to ask these challenging questions can seem daunting. You know something is wrong in your relationship, but you are not sure what. If you are beginning to wonder if you are experiencing abuse, this book can offer you support, information, and, most of all, hope as you look for answers. Written by two women with a wealth of experience supporting victims of abuse, When Love Hurts introduces exercises and resources to help you make sense of your relationship, addressing all forms of abuse, including verbal, emotional, financial, sexual, and physical. This practical guidebook is a supportive and nonjudgmental friend to those who don't know where to turn and is filled with stories from women who have been in the same position. By drawing on your own wisdom and that of the many others who have shared your experience, When Love Hurts can help you find the answers you have been looking for.

Even though love should be beautiful and fun, it can also cause emotional ups and downs. In Love Me True, marriage and family therapist Dr. Jason B. Whiting uses engaging, relatable stories to show that deception is often at the root of relationship breakdown and teach how couples can use truth to strengthen their relationships. 9781462118618Paperback / softback14.99 Jason B. Whiting

In the age of online dating, finding a real connection can seem more daunting than ever! So, why not stack the odds of finding the right person in your favor? This book offers simple, proven-effective principles drawn from neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find the perfect mate.Everybody wants someone to love and spend time with, and searching for your ideal partner is a natural and healthy human tendency. Just about everyone dates at some point in their lives, yet few really understand what they're doing or how to get the best results. In Wired for Dating, psychologist and relationship expert Stan Tatkin—author of Wired for Love—offers powerful tips based in neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find a compatible mate and go on to create a fabulous relationship.Using real-life scenarios, you'll learn key concepts about how people become attracted to potential partners, move toward or away from commitment, and the important role the brain and nervous system play in this process. Each chapter explores the scientific concepts of attachment theory, arousal regulation, and neuroscience. And with a little practice, you'll learn to apply these exercises and practical techniques to your dating life.If you're ready to get serious (or not!) about dating, meet your match, and have more fun, this book will be your guide.

Temporal Love: Temporality and Romantic Relationships deals with personal, social and cultural time perceptions and their impact on love and romantic relationships. By focusing on time orientation and its representation in romantic relationships, this book reveals the latent links between temporality and love. Given that the Western conception of time is based on the ability to distinguish and compare among time units and time intervals, fascinating layers of covert romantic ties are revealed: the representation of temporality in marriage and non-marital relationships as well as in long-term'no strings attached'ones; the blurred boundaries between expectations based on past relationships, present love and future intimacy; the real world of'here and now'vs. virtual intimacy and sexuality in the cyber age; the interjecting of'there-and-then'into'here-and-now'; the need to cope with'ghosts from the past'; the reverberation of dating time back and forth coupling intimacy rituals; nostalgic'there-and-then'; romantic secrets; deception and betrayal, and more. Temporal Love: Temporality and Romantic Relationships draws a comparison between'natural,'warm spontaneity free of external romantic intervention with'mechanical'cold, pre-scheduled and monitored love and intimacy. Spontaneous temporal behavior is depicted as authentic and fatalistic behavior, whereas planned ahead of time is portrayed as rational and alienated. Furthermore, there is an analysis of'time trading,'i.e., investing in romance and maintaining long-term romantic relationships via investing'time coins'in hopes of future profit. Among other things, taking a break from one's lover, breaking up or getting a divorce are represented as a kind of'financial'write-off, whereas a sense of permanency in a relationship might be viewed as a successful time investment. Simultaneously, the'time trading'phenomenon generates a tendency to raise the stakes in the relationship and boost the willingness to'work'at it and make a commitment. Finally, Temporal Love: Temporality and Romantic Relationships attempts to illuminate efforts to minimize'temporal damage'and maximize'temporal gains,'while raising personal, social and cultural expectations for a'happily ever after'and'till death do us part'romantic experience.

If a breakup or divorce has drained your confidence and shattered your self-esteem, this book is for you. Written by a clinical psychologist and expert in women's health, Who Am I Without You? will help you work through your heartache, rediscover your self-worth, and learn to live and love again. Breakups can send you into a tailspin, causing an identity crisis and loss of self-worth. So how do you get back to the person you once were? Who Am I Without You? will teach you powerful skills based in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), positive psychology, and mindfulness that will help you tackle the difficult emotions that can surface after a breakup, such as grief, loss, anger, fear, worry, and low self-esteem. Comprised of fifty-two small chapters, the tools and exercises in this book are easy to apply, and will help you pick up the pieces of your broken identity, put them back together, shine yourself up, and get back out into the world—whole again and better than ever. Anyone who's been through a breakup or divorce knows just how painful it can be. And nowhere does a breakup or divorce hit harder than our identity and sense of self-worth. If you're ready to move past the pain of the end of your relationship and reclaim your confidence, this book will show you how.

The Tool Kit No Relationship Should Be Without Long-term happiness in love depends on a couple's ability to repair the inevitable rifts and differences, large and small, that occur in any relationship. Neuroscience suggests that relationship upsets are best mended quickly, or they accumulate in long-term memory, increase reactive communication, and become harder to repair successfully. And good repair takes five minutes or less! This book offers practical tools and suggested scripts for resolving problems and having your needs met. Following its guidance, you can turn difficulties into opportunities to foster love, trust, and thriving intimacy.

From a Washington Post weddings reporter who's covered more than two hundred walks down the aisle comes a warm, witty, and wise book about relationships—the mystery, the science, and the secrets of how we find love and make it last. Ellen McCarthy has explored the complete journey of our timeless quest for “The One,” the Soul Mate, the Real Thing. This indispensable collection of insights—on dating, commitment, breakups, weddings, and marriage—gives us a window into enduring romance: • Go Online Already—“It's a major time suck and a black hole of rejection and ambiguity and lies. But you know what? It also works.” • Keep It Confidential—“If you have to get something off your chest, pick someone whose wisdom you really trust, and who isn't likely to spread the gossip to all your mutual acquaintances.” • Be Nice—“Brewing the morning coffee, touching the small of your partner's back, filling their car with gas. These things add up to more relationship satisfaction than a fancy dinner on Valentine's Day ever could.” The Real Thing features many more nuggets of wisdom, valuable information from the latest studies on commitment, candid testimonials from a variety of couples, and the personal story of McCarthy's own search for “the keeper”—which begins, ironically, with a breakup the very same day she started as the Post's full-time weddings reporter. Whether you're looking for love or looking to strengthen your relationship, this book is a wonderful and clear-eyed map to the human heart.Praise for The Real Thing “A wise and compassionate look at how we love, along with some gentle suggestions for how we could get a little better at it... McCarthy has done something rare: She has written an optimistic book about love that is clear-eyed and unsentimental.”—The Washington Post“What a charming and captivating book this is! We never stop learning about love, and so many great lessons are within these pages.”—Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love “My readers often say to me, ‘If we lived next door to each other, we'd be best friends.'That is precisely what I wanted to say to smart, funny, self-effacing Ellen McCarthy after I finished reading The Real Thing. I loved every lesson laid out in a book that wouldn't dare to call itself a field guide to marriage but amounts to as much on every page. This is a deeply useful little book.”—Kelly Corrigan, author of Glitter and Glue “Upbeat and sweet... This rich collection of stories charms and edifies, is filled with quotes from couples as well as experts in the field, and serves as not just stories to sigh over but lessons to apply.”—Booklist (starred review) “A fun read full of wonderful stories... McCarthy delivers a welcome combination of cynicism and poignancy in this account, which reads with the ease and accessibility of a self-help book.”—Library Journal “A comforting, realistic, and endearing portrait of modern relationships... This book will not only charm those in decades-old marriages, but also inspire those afraid love will never arrive for them.”—Publishers Weekly “Straight-talking... dating advice for adults of all ages.”—Kirkus Reviews

Love is the answer and you are the key to unlocking its potential. From the popular New York Times best-selling author of the People Tools series comes People Tools for Love and Relationships. With 49 easy to use tools, Alan Fox's latest installment will teach you how to create and maintain great relationships with immediate results. Finding love isn't always easy. Being in love and sustaining that love can be even harder. Alan Fox is full of practical advice and guidelines for keeping things fresh and celebrating love in all its manifestations. These tools are specifically designed to teach you everything you need to nourish a long and fulfilling relationship. Each tool is fleshed out with colorful anecdotes and Fox's own discerning insights. It's time to take full responsibility for creating and maintaining your ideal relationship. Stop blaming others—the key to a great relationship is you. People Tools is packed with the wisdom of a full, long, and varied life. Alan Fox will guide you through the ins and outs of building worthwhile, rewarding relationships. Learn to: · Find the right person, and be the right person · Work out core issues and compromise · Accept the things you can't change · Find the right way to say “I'm sorry” · Know when to put yourself first · Live without regret